don't ask don't tell

A stupid policy that forces the discharge of gays and lesbians from the military.

I guess this means that all men aren't created equal.

Why is the government so friggin' stupid?

349👍 172👎

ask your mama

Reply to a request that you have no intention of fulfilling.

Dude approaches me at the gas station. "Say man, can you spare a couple of bucks for some gas?"
I said, "You need some gas?"
"Yes"
"Well, ask your mama!", I replied.

1👍 2👎

when did i ask

the worst of worst unfunny jokes ever to exist you arent funny, u are just annoying. please stop it, before i kill you.

"hey but when"
"tomorrow?"
"no when did i ask."
"SHUT THE FUCKING FUCK UP U FUCKING LITTLE MAN SLUT WHORE BITCH ASS DUMB FUC BEFORE I FUCK U UP U ANNOYING FUCKING LITTLE BOY"

35👍 13👎

ask a stupid question day

a holiday which falls on the last skool day in September, usually September 30th
self-explanatory; a day that is celebrated by asking a lot of stupid questions, mainly to your teachers/professors
only funny if you get many people to participate, in which case it can be the most fun and looked-forward-to day of the year
it is perfectly placed, in that it is soon enough after summer that everyone is still sad that summer's over and could use some laughs, yet it is late enough that you have already gotten to know your teachers fairly well, and know the limits to how many stupid questions you can ask them and not get into trouble

Examples of questions that could be asked on ask a stupid question day:
Ms. Milio, if the moon exploded, what would happen to us?

Why is Hamlet so sad his father died, Ms. Farrell?

What's the square root of 4, Ms. Sirakos?

Ms. Intrieri, what would've happened if the Reformation had never happened, or if it had happened in Asia?

Mme. Bertacchi, how do you say "I'll stab you with a knife" in French?

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Funny you should ask

Someone who reminds somebody else about something he forgot to ask.

How did you won that Pastry contest?
Funny you should ask.
I made a cake covered in cream and strawberries.
That made me victorious.

13👍 4👎

Ask Her Out Day

Ask the person you like to go out with you on November 20th.
Boy "I like you"
Girl "Sorry I don't think of you like that"

Ask Her Out Day Boy "I like you"
Girl "Sorry I don't think of you like that"

Funny you should ask

The saying that a person is about to use before going off on a three-hour monologue about something that happened to them that you accidentally brought up.

You: How is your dog
Person: Funny you should ask
*3 hours later*
Person: that's how it all happened
You: can i go now