Herbal Essences

Woman's shampoo, except some guy nuts in it for a variety of reasons. Some reasons that may drive a man to add their cum to a shampoo bottle are including, but not limited to: Revenge, extreme sexual confusion, being high as fuck, or just for the sheer pleasure of knowing that your girlfriend's abstinence pact is pointless.

John: "I've been adding some herbal essences to my cousin's shampoo because I suspect she is cheating on me, but now she is pregnant, any chance I could be the father?"
James: "What the fuck is wrong with you?"
John: "So I could be the father?"
James: "Yes, you probably are, but you deserve everything that is coming to you."
John: "I'll just say I'm going to get some milk, that's what my dad said"

211👍 39👎

time is of the essence

Time is the most important thing in the world.

Hurry up, time is of the essence.

49👍 7👎

herbal essences

A shampoo that somehow makes women experience a sexual orgasm. One major reason why the birth rate has fallen.

(heavy moaning and delighted shrieks in the bathroom)
Teen: Oh god! Mom's using the Herbal Essences again!
Mother: Oh Yes! Yes!!! Yes!

Shampoo making people orgasm? It doesn't make me that happy and I usually have to fake it.

230👍 62👎

Herbal Essences

A shampoo brand.

"omg!!! have u tried this new shampoo??? its called herbal essences and it works w o n d e r s !"

"Get the fuck away from me, Karen, before I call the police."

20👍 4👎

Willy Essence

The odour found in close proximity to the male genitals. It is usually a warm, moist, pissy smell, that lingers on the balls or on the Jock.

It typically occurs after a warm night, after strenuous exercise or after prolonged periods without showering.

It can be smelt when laying or sitting close to the male genitalia.

"Why Bob, What is that pissy smell coming from your jocks?"

"Don't worry Sandra, I haven't had a shower for a couple of days, that's my Willy Essence you can smell."

"Well have shower soon because that stinks like musty cock and I'm not going anywhere near that Willy essence."

"Jeez, sorry Sandra but I don't complain about your fanny essence."

11👍 1👎

Herbal Essence

While having sex in the shower with your girl, you pull out and nut in her hair and then use it as shampoo.

Last night my girlfriend got a great herbal essence experience.

95👍 41👎

herbal essence

A form of revenge involving unscrewing the cap of a shampoo bottle and depositing jizz; "a totally orgasmic experience."

"So now all my roommates shower with herbal essences."

"They have totally orgasmic experiences?"

"No, but I did."

51👍 22👎