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When you look left and Bruce Willis snaps your neck
The Kansas City Shuffle is when everyone looks left....
::unsuspecting sap looks left::
::Snap::
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This is a sexual act involving three (3) males and one (1) female. The female must be completely unshaven in her nether regions (i.e. The Hedge). The performing male lays completely naked and erect on the ground of an outdoor track 17.38 miles from the nearest Arby's. The two assisting males then pick him up by the ankles and wrists, bending him back so that his arms and legs are stretched backward with his erect penis facing forwards, thus resembling the shape of a hedge clipper. The volunteering woman is then willingly tied to a large sheet of particle board while naked at the 69-meter mark on the track. The board is angled at 60 degrees (pi/3 radians). The two carrying males now begin charging at the woman, third male held firmly in their hands. They stop running just short of the woman, the carried male's penis mere centimeters from entering his lover's poontang. The carrying males back up to the 0-meter mark and run up again, stopping just short once more and retreating. On their third and final attempt, the carrying duo charge at the woman (with the third still being carried) with true intent. As they reach the woman, they lift the third male slightly higher. This causes him to miss the vagina and ram his girth into the area just above it. The angle of the woman, combined with the speed and raw power of the man, result in a gargantuan frictional force that obliterates any trace of hair on the woman's meat flaps. Thus, the Kansas City Hedgeclipper has been performed.
Guy 1: Man, you would not believe what my girlfriend and I did last night!
Guy 2: I bet I won't believe it! What did you do?
Guy 1: We performed the Kansas City Hedgeclipper! It was so fun and wild; I can't wait to do it again!
After committing a sexual act in a Porta John with a girlfriend or a female in a "related" or "unrelated" state, you walk out and lock her in there. Then you tip over the Porta John. This act is done to dump your girlfriend or partener.
"Dude, that Kansas City Shakedown did the trick dumping her!"
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The Kansas City Shuffle: a "Kansas City Shuffle" is a most clever deception, one that requires thought on the part of the inciter and great ignorance on the part of the deceived. The primary goal of the Kansas City Shuffle is to catch one completely off-guard and unaware so that trickery can take place.
The movie Lucky Number Sleven's plot was an example of The Kansas City Shuffle at its best.
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The storyline of the 2006 film Lucky Number Slevin uses a "Kansas City Shuffle" as the primary plot device. As Mr. Goodkat mentions, "A Kansas City Shuffle is when everybody looks left, you go right." The origin of its name is revealed when a cover version of the song, performed by J. Ralph, plays at the end of the film. An item of interest regarding the Kansas City Shuffle is that while you've been reading this I've been fucking your mom.
For an example of the Kansas City Shuffle, see above.
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A Kansas City slider is a pole dancer who seductively dry-humps the stripper pole during a performance, feigning masturbation, while wearing an extremely brief costume. The sheer public eroticism of the act is has a sure impact in encouraging larger amounts of tips.
Maude was disappointed in her tips from the last set, so she became a Kansas City slider for her 11:00 set.
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A big wad of singles with a fifty dollar bill surrounding them to give the impression of wealth.
"Don't let him fool you. It's a Kansas City bankroll."
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