Michigan

The only state where you can hold up your hand, point, and say i live THERE -> because your hand is your map

A state where it can be 30 degrees one day, and 80 degrees the next

Residents have there own pick up line, 'Will you hold my map?'

I live in Michigan, it's cold.
'Will you hold my map?' is my favorite pickup line.

10👍 4👎

Michigan

The best state. The home of cars and cereal.

The best MI cites:
Benton Harbor
Detroit
K-Zoo
Flint Grand Rapids

Every city except Hell, Michigan

Nothing like good ol' Michigan.

118👍 91👎

Michigan

A Midwestern state with two count em two peninsulas. There are some awesome cities here such as my hometown Ann Arbor. The weather may be incredibly unpredictable, but winters are fun (for the first few weeks before the slush comes in late February) and the 5 great lakes are always fun in the summer. We are all very friendly people. Plus several movies have been shot here because of the low taxes. So like michigan is AWESOME.

Hail to the victors valiant! One of the fun Michigan fight songs.

13👍 7👎

Michigan

-A magical, mitten-shaped land consisting primarily of trees, whitetail deer, squirrels, beaches, and snow. Inhabited by a race of people which are said to never complain about the cold, have a diet of which is made of 85% venison and beer, and are rumored to be direct descendants of Canadians.
-Consists of the U.P. and the lower peninsula. Don’t ever call it the “L.P.”
-Where whitetail deer come from.
-Where whitetail deer flee from in November.
-Tourists are both hated and loved here. The state needs them for a sustainable economy, yet it doesn't matter where you go; if you are a tourist, no one likes you.
-All five Great Lakes belong to Michigan. Ontario included. Which is why Michigan is also called the “Great Lakes State”. Deal with it.
-An Asian Carp’s dream home.
-Therefore, Asian Carp are a Michigander/Michiganian’s greatest fear (other than running out of beer and deer to hunt).
-There is only one sports rivalry that matters: University of Michigan and Michigan State.
-Nobody in Michigan can drive worth a damn unless there’s snow on the ground. But even if there is snow on the ground, one should drive cautiously; this excludes douche bags with trucks. They quickly end up in the ditches.
-Detroit… just… sucks. Anyone who lives outside Detroit considers it it’s own state. It’s often referred to as “Un-Michigan” or “Red Wings Land”.
-Without Detroit, Michigan would be much further down on the obesity and crime lists.
-See also: Canada.

Person A: So where are you from?
Person B: Michigan.
Person A: Oh really, me too. What part?
Person B: Detroit.
Person A: ...Oh... So, uh... I hear they have hockey over there, huh?

25👍 19👎

Michigan

A state that always says fuq u to anything and anyone. Detroit is the Unofficial capital of this badass state and overshadows the real capital which is Lansing

Snows on Saturday
Muddy by Monday
Michigan doesn't care about your snowdays

16👍 11👎

Michigan

It's a state of bitter, cocksure alcoholic former blue-collar laborers who can't find decent jobs because Michigan is an economic black-hole. It snows alot, and when it doesn't snow it's extremely fucking hot or ball-shrinkingly cold. Crime runs rampant in its urban centers and life just plain sucks in its small towns due to boredom. There are a lot of lakes, dunes and forests, but people from Michigan couldn't give two fucks about them because they are everywhere, and Michiganders have better things to do like drink and worry about paying bills they have no money for. Naturally, morons from out of state flock in droves to look at things that really aren't that interesting.

Michiganders are divided into two groups: Michiganders and Yoopers. Michiganders are like as described before. Yoopers are essentially Canadians, and basically not human. The only thing a Michigander hates more than other Americans and foreigners are Yoopers. Yoopers are too stupid and inbred to consider hating anyone else because they live happy-go-lucky lives as lumberjacks and have sex with their sisters and occasionally a beaver. Yoopers are very proud of themselves despite having little to be proud of, and call southerners "trolls" because they live "under da bridge, don'tcha know." Michiganders seethe with rage about this, but can't do anything about it because the logic is infallible in a retarded sort of way, and also beating up a Yooper is much like striking a child; fun, but frowned upon.

Michigander: "What the fuck are you so happy about?"
Californian: "I live in a state with nice weather and jobs."
Michigander: "Go fuck yourself!"

Yooper: *unintellible sing-songy nonsense that sounds like Canadian*
Michigander: "Goddamn Yoopers."

77👍 78👎

Michigan

Another name for hell.

Anyone who lives in Michigan hates it here.

188👍 243👎