Business Needs

Company speak used by slop-badgering managers to mean "We're going to shaft you up the arse because we can!". Normally used to justify business decisions that have no justification, or rhtyme or reason for that matter.

We are going to half your wages and double your hours due to business needs.

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need to seed

Every Bro is born with it. Just got to spread that seed in any hole we can find.

“That chick is a smoke show really giving me the need to seed”

Do the needful

The person uttering the phrase has indicated to the listener that they have decided the issue being discussed is not their problem. They don't care how it is solved, but know they will not be involved in solving it.

The network connection is failing sporadically only when going through this particular router, but I have checked it's logs and see no errors. It is not a problem with my network, but with your software. Do the needful and fix this issue (and spend many, many hours gathering additional data to prove beyond any doubt it is the router).

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need a lift

To need to get driven somewhere in a car.

'I need a lift. Can you drive me there?'

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needed killing

A regional term in the South and parts of the Southwest. A person can become such a trial and burden on those around hin that when someone finally shoots him, everyone who knew him says, "Well... He needed killing." It was often used in reference to outlaws when word arrived of their deaths.

In modern times the usage is more in terms of referring to a bad sort as "he needs killing". There are, however, several recorded instances where someone on trial for murder has attempted to use it as a defense - sort of a 'self-defense after long history of intolerable actions' kind of thing. Sometimes the dirty, rotten *&%#@%&#* NEEDED KILLING!

When a notorious criminal is executed: "He needed killing!"

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citation needed

Wikipedianese for 'bullshit'.

Jade Goody's death triggered an outpouring of grief across the United Kingdom citation needed

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hi need

A response to a person that you know wants a favor or something from you, may it be a sexual favor or just to get something for them.

Nicki Minaj: Where is lil wayne? *wants sexual favor*
Gucci Mane: Hes over there
Nicki Minaj: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZY!
Lil Wayne: hi need.