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Change Offering

Proposition by a homless man for you to give him money or sexual favors in exchange for money, or just go into a store and buy him beer.

When approached by a homeless man, who claims he is not an alcoholic. Even though he just got done telling you that he has 200 dollars in food stamps and uses it to buy soda to empty it out and return the cans to buy beer. he also states he had gotten caught and not allowed in the Kroger. When running away from this man he screams "you preppies! i went to Olivet College!" and suggests a change offering.

by BUM FIGHTS!!! April 30, 2011


Flaccid Offerings

The frantic mental bartering made by male unable to get hard-on at crucial time; made to the god of erections.

No matter how many Flaccid Offerings I promised, nothing was happening down there, so I just blamed her.

by Urb Snake March 17, 2023


introductory offer

(1) Refers to how a "perpetually horny" guy thinks whenever a fellow bachelor verbally acquaints him with an attractive lady; the sex-hungry stud interprets this casual INTRODUCTION as an OFFER to him to take the gal to bed.
(2) How a girl's spread-eagled legs are interpreted by her significant other or by anyone else of "opportunistic mindset" who happens to be within sight of her --- the unaware gal may have simply been stretching sleepily, getting comfortable while squatting/sitting flat, or otherwise merely performing a casual and "innocent" action, with no intention of trying to "solicit" herself, but any horny guy in the vicinity will automatically view the girl's crotch-baring action as an OFFER for him to INTRODUCE that portion of HIS "equipment" that resides between his OWN legs.

Clueless dude: I never know which “signal” my girlfriend is sending when I happen to see her lying back with her legs spread --- I can't tell if she's making me an introductory offer, or if she is merely “airing herself out” during hot weather or after a shower.

by QuacksO August 20, 2013


Rhetorical offer

Offer that is given without the means to fulfill it or to get someone's hopes up

I will send you a naked picture of me covered with digestives - that is obviously a rhetorical offer

by tobukata June 7, 2017


Fake Offer

An offer you don't expect someone to accept and you don't want them to, but will deliver on if they accept. Typically, a fake offer is offered for the reason of appearing polite or for the hopes of receiving a real offer in return in the future.

I just fake offered to pick up Josh from the airport. I hope he says no because I don't want to have to get up at 7:00am

by Mr. W0nderful September 15, 2020


Special offer

A mentally challenged murderer

“Take a look at that retard over there”
Shh, you’re getting us killed, that’s Dave, he’s a special offer

by Johnny Tramp November 30, 2020


Gouch Offering

The act of marinating your hand in your gouch region, preceded by the presentation of your hand to an individual for the inhalation of the aroma.

"Can I provide you with a "gouch offering"?

Yes, I would love to smell your sweaty ball sack infused hands

"And how about you, can I offer you as well"?

No, than you I'm good.

Logical reason, please.

I am chewing gum, and the flavor will take away form the beauty and centrality of the gouch aroma.

Fair enough. Gouch ya later.

by marinatingoffering September 29, 2010

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