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The pygmy shrew is a fascinating creature, the smallest animal in God's Kingdom. The shrew is almost completely blind, and must rely on its barely adequare sense of smell to avoid its natural predators... the fox, the badger, the cat, the dog, the bear, the dolphin, the donkey, the bat, the crayfish, the buffalo, the saw, the polar bear, the crab, the plane, the monkey, the saw, the fork, the banshee, the harpsichord, the common-earthworm, and other shrews. The shrew is so tiny that it cannot maintain body heat without constant exposure to sunlight. In the winter, most will not survive... The shrew's young are born utterly hairless, and will remain so for the rest of their lives. They are entirely dependent on their mother - most of whom die in labor. The mothers that do survive face a grim future, hunted and killed by their young for sport. 99% of the baby shrews will not survive their first night unless they are found by a kindly shrew farm attendant...
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A man whose charm and masculine powers of seduction render even the most empowered women vulnerable to him. A feminist's Kryptonite. Derived from William Shakespeare's "Taming of the Shrew."
Person 1: I hear Tim got into April's panties.
Person 2: Yeah, pretty impressive. She's always saying she doesn't need a man.
Person 1: He's a shrew tamer, all right.
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A man that has a pointed shrew penis and very small.
That boy Javon'te gotta Shrew Penis!
A state in which one completely removes themselves form the outside world in order to create a personal utopia. Shrew mode consists of the silencing of one's mobile phone in tandem with complete ignorance of any landlines present. Ideally, it is a time spent in the nude wearing nothing but socks and perhaps a towel; however, certain residency restraints may prohibit this from being possible. A typical entrance to shrew mode consists of ingesting large amounts of THC while alternating between eating, laying on a couch/bed, listening to music, getting lost in one's own thoughts, ingesting more THC, jerking off, showering, and thoroughly enjoying that no one can contact you to ruin this heavenous endeavor. In the event that one shrew notices his silent cell phone lighting up signifying a received text message or incoming call, it is customary tradition to look away and curse whoever is trying to ruin your time.
Ex. 1 -
Froob: Bro, Leonard hasn't been answering his phone for a couple days
Vincent: Dude, he's probably in shrew mode
Froob: That's the 5th time he's gone into shrew mode this month, I wish I lived his life...
Ex. 2 -
Jones 1: Dude how come you didn't answer my calls all week?
Jones 2: Sorry man, I was in shrew mode from Monday til today.
Jones 1: Understood man.
Ex. 3 -
Chud: How come you never respond to my texts bro?
Savage: Because half the time I'm in shrew mode and half the time I ignore you because you're a douche.
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Footwear worn with the intent of causing serious injury to small mammalian rodents.
...I see this shrew run into these shrubs. So I stood up, walked over to the shrubs and started stompin' around with my shrew stompers. I heard this high pitched shreak as my right shrew stomper came down on him. It wasn't dead though, so I looked around and sure enough, there was a cinder block. Well, being the highly evolved homo sapien that I am, I picked up the cinder block, moved my shrew stomper, and dropped the cinder block. The shreaking stopped after that. I looked toward the ocean, let out a BEEEEYAAAAAAAAY as I felt the cool ocean breeze blow my button up shirt back like a cape of glory. Then I went back to my seat and ashed in a walruses glass.
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n. a person from the middle east. Golden in complexion perfectly complemented with a rough black beard. many sand shrews can be found traveling in caravans.
Look at that damn sand shrew over there. He is giving G.W. a piping hot carl!
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1. One, generally a female, who is incredibly annoying, obnoxious, and completely unaware of their complete stupidity.
2. A male who acts in such a completely feminine or ridiculous manner that no swear can describe his actions, and therefore he must be compared to an annoying female.
3. An attractive biddy who won't put out.
1. Man, I hear that bitch posts on the masslive cheerleading forum and has a voice like an infected weasel. She must be a skank shrew.
2. Pull the tampon out of your ass and have a beer, fuckin skank shrew.
3. Good lord, look at that fine ass, i would just love to lay her down...fuck, it's a skank shrew.
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