A euphemism for being an absolute fucking moron.
Person 1: *does something retarded*
Person 2: You fucking shemp
The act of ejaculating in someone’s buttcheeks, and then sucking it out with a straw
I totally shemped Jesse the other day
When you get slapped so hard across the head or face that your hair get's messed up.
Look at Cory's hair, he just got shemp slapped.