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utility jerk

When you haven't masterbated in a while and need to clean out your system.
If not, your day will be spent staring at pictures and getting turned on by everything.

"I haven't masturbated in a while. I'm going to need to do a utility jerk if I want to get work done." ~ Mr. Regular

by fadumpt March 9, 2015


utility-kinkster

One whose sexual discourse is determined by external forces and/or available resource.

Do to freezing temperatures the utility-kinksters were forced to grind on each other in an exotic dance of passion and life saving heat transfer.

by Dr.Skaz August 1, 2013


utility cock

Much like a vibrator, a utility cock is someone's dick you use simply for pleasure. Kind of like a use it and lose it until you need it again kind of thing.

"Hey Jess, you seeing Marc again tonight?"

"Yeah, he's sort of like my utility cock if you will."

by BonerDonor December 4, 2009

6๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Utility Shit

When you take a dump and its all Water and Gas.

Oh man I just took a mean utility shit.

by RiotStu April 29, 2008

5๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Utility beer

Utility beer is the beer you keep around for the day-to-day moments when beer is a necessity to assist in pedestrian activities (golf, plumbing, yardwork, babysitting, staff meetings, Zoom calls). For the beer snob it is the beer you save for neighbors when they drop in at 3 p.m. on a Tuesday. It is differentiated from the actual high-end beer you save for special events, holidays, and special tastings.

Person 1: Dave, did you bring along those hazy craft IPA's so we could drink while cleaning Lyle's pool?
Person 2: Nope. I just have a bunch of utility beer that Steve dumped on me. Good enough for this. It is only 10:30 a.m.

by lakeshore February 1, 2022


utility fruit

Slang for an Apple, as it can be easily turned into a smoking device by punching holes in it with a pen.

Lets go to the grocery store and grab some utility fruit.

by some stoner October 22, 2006


Utility Mate

A Utility Mate is a friend you call on occasionally when your core circle of friends are not available.

I had a spare ticket for the match last weekend which nobody wanted so I sold it to my Utility Mate and he came with me instead.

by Jordo1981 July 29, 2010