Muffin Bear

an endearing term used for ones loving female significant other, similar to sweetie, babe, honey etc. however "muffin bear" also refers to the female's high attractiveness and very tight vaginal canal. She also pays half the bills.

the word "awesome" can be used conjunctionally with the phrase: "i was mauled by a muffin bear"

:Example:
Chris: Muffin Bear, you're one sexy lover!
Sarah: mmm, i rode you so hard, here is my 1/2 of the rent.

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muffin munch

to moisten a female's genetalia by joint actions of lips and tongue for repayment for services.

Man: I'll bet you a blow job.
Woman: I'll bet you a muffin munch!

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cunt muffin

n. Used to describe someone who is a failure at life in general. Second most creative insult ever (see cock juggling thunder cunt).

see also: fuckwit,assmunch,twat waffle,fucktard

Person 1: You know what? You're a fucktard.
Person 2: Shut up, assface
Person 1: Bitch tit!
Person 2: Fuckwit!
Person 1: Twat waffle!
Person 2: CUNT MUFFIN!
*silence*
Person 3: Damn... you got served

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Fresh Muffin

A hottie little babe that just turned the legal age of 18.

Dude! I heard you went out with Meghan last night and got some.
Yea, Braaaaa. Knocked it up good!
Ya know she's only 17.
No dude. Her birthday was last week. She's now a Fresh Muffin.
Sweet!

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Crusty Muffin

When someone with a mustache (male or female), administers oral sex on a female and lets the vaginal fluids crustify onto the mustache.

"Jimbo grew a mustache in anticipation for his inaugural crusty muffin."

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cum muffin

A paper towel, tissue or toilet paper that is cummed into and then wadded up.

"Ew, I found one of your cum muffins on the floor of your room!"

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muffin slap

This is a physical diss for all girls who have muffin tops. You approach one of these unfortunates from behind (for those more daring, or rather semi-retarded, you can advance from the front) and with both hands slap her muffins. After you have properly abused your victim, it is best to make a quick getaway and shout from the top of your lungs, "MUFFIN SLAP!!"

Girl: (crying) I totally just got muffin slapped!

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