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Twilight

STUPID BOOKS AND MOVIES

MLIAer hate (Twilight)

by MLIA:) January 25, 2011

1๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilightitis

A mental condition, usually found in teenage girls, which causes them to have strange and erratic behavior for the sake of twilight.

John: Dude, did you hear about what my girlfriend did last night?
Bill: What happened?
John: She made out with a dog because it reminded her of Jacob Black.
Bill: Shit, that sucks, dude. Dump her; I think she has twilightitis.

by cadtel July 13, 2010


twilight

an insult to authors everywhere. despite its lack of literary devices, figurative language, descriptive elements, and any talent, it is purely addicting due to the fact that it creates false hope worldwide for lonely, single teenage girls because it tells a tale of an irresistable vampire falling for an unnatractive human.

it is often compared to the harry potter book series, which is quite cruel because twilight obviously has no chance of winning and will never even come close to being as good as harry potter.

j.k. rowling, author of harry potter, has become a success due to skill and ingenius writing.
stephenie meyer was lucky, and obviously had some strings pulled when she managed to get it published.

AND THE TWILIGHT MOVIE OPENING IN NOVEMBER CAUSED WARNER BROTHERS TO PUSH BACK THE RELEASE DATE OF HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE ALL THE WAY TO JULY AND THATS JUST NOT FREAKING FAIR!!!!!!

in twilight, if edward cullen= cedric diggory, and cedric diggory< peter pettigrew, and peter pettigrew< voldemort, and harry potter> voldemort, then edward cullen< harry potter.

by mkafhiktjn April 11, 2009

57๐Ÿ‘ 94๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

A novel containing an over-used plotline and has absolutely no originality. It's popularity is comparative to that of the Harry Potter and Girls Gone Wild series, while most of the GGW fans find themsleves more turned on by Hagrid than anything from Twilight. Please note that any female aged 9 - 68 has a 96.1% chance on creaming themselves if they see a Twilight poster. You have been warned.

That book Twilight was a cheap knockoff combination of Underworld and Mama Mia.

by King Mike December 30, 2009

97๐Ÿ‘ 173๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

Twilight is absolute literary trash that needs to be wiped from the face of the earth, however it has managed to make several previously sane girls become absolute idiots. Why? I'll tell you. It's not that Edward is just "soooo hawwt" that they just can't forget him and want to hump him, as perverted as humping a 107 year old stone that sparkles sounds. The draw is in the fact that every girl wants to be loved in a *SIMILAR* fashion to the way Edward claims to love Bella. Every girl fantasizes about someone who will (1) Profess their undying love for you without any thought to who's around (2) Swoop in and rescue you from the 'bad guy' (3) Admit that they would die for you...etc etc, the list goes on. Now I'm not saying that this is the ultimate guy, but can you honestly say that you NEVER wanted a knight in shining armor to show up and sweep you away?

That's the draw for the Twitards, even if they don't realize it. Call it the prince charming effect. And the absolutely bland characters? That just makes it easy for said Twitards to insert themselves and their own fantasy man into the roles. If you look at other vampire romance novels, like Christine Feehan's Dark series, you get the same prince charming effect, except these women have brains, back bones, and lives of their very own and the men have real respect for the women as well as their own power. Yeah, there's still a ridiculous age gap, but the youngest woman involved is in her mid twenties and legal anyway.

Summary of decent vampiric romance novel:
Woman: You scare me, back the f*** off and leave me alone.
Man: Please, listen to me. Explains.
Woman: That's supposed to make me think you're OK? Leave!
Bad thing attacks.
Woman: WTF! I told you to leave me alone. That never would have happened if you had.
Man:Yes it would. Explains.
Woman: Fine you can stay but you're sleeping outside.

Then they eventually fall in love after a reasonable amount of time where they have earned each other's respect, with a few spicy scenes.

Twilight
B: You're a vampire. You drink blood. COOL!
E: HATE ME!!!!
B: I love you
E: I love you too even though I want you to hate me.
Bad thing attacks
B:I love you. Stay with me!
E: ok

Minus all remotely interesting scenes
See the difference?

by garnettotopaz November 28, 2010

4๐Ÿ‘ 3๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

Originally a book
that people did not fucking read
Until some dude or duddett decided too make a movie about it and made every one a fake,a hypocrite, a follower
Get this trough your fucking thick skulls
the book is old and if you barely reading it and saying that you love it cuz of the movie then fuck off

Its a Virus a Epidemic >:(

dude he just Twilight his pants :(!

by Sammy Samm Samm February 16, 2009

27๐Ÿ‘ 41๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

A captivating book by Stephenie Meyer, but a bit in the blue about the muddled description of vampires. I'm guessing that she either did not research vampires and vampirism carefully or did not care about the myth-facts, for there were several gaping plot holes throughout the book. Also, it took several exact elements from Anne Rice's book The Vampire Lestat, my point being the trite unoriginality of Edward and Bella's relationship and the too exact similarities between Edward Cullen and Lestat DeLioncourt. The precursor to the sequal New Moon.

"You are exactly my brand of herion. . . " - Edward Cullen, Twilight.

"This is a. . . .um. . . . *big* Jeep you have," Isabella Swan, Twilight.

by Mushroom Hat May 7, 2007

131๐Ÿ‘ 251๐Ÿ‘Ž