Mafia Syndrome

A condition characterized by an overwhelming sense of paranoia at having one's back exposed or unprotected; The person who sits in the back of the class, or the back of the restaurant, or in the corner, like a real creeper, who is afraid of spontaneous back stabbings by strangers or hit men; So named because of the old days where mafia members never sat at a place in a restaurant where they could be attacked or caught unawares by someone coming in the front door. It has since carried over to the modern day, where it isn't really necessary, (unless you live in a third world country or maybe Iraq or North Korea) but somehow still affects people in all walks of life.

Waitress: "Sir, will this table be alright?"

Creeper: "No... no, let me have that booth that's in the corner...and turn out the light over the table please. I normally eat in the dark."

--

Waitress to Hostess: "Why didn't you warn me that creep has mafia syndrome?"

Salary Syndrome

The slacking that occurs when an employee realizes that they're going to continue to receive their paycheck regardless of how much time they actually spend working.

Dan was a great employee until he caught Salary Syndrome, I watched him click a pen for 90 minutes yesterday before leaving a half hour early.

Tandy Syndrome

When someone in the office is given a nickname they refuse to acknowledge and the resulting defiance has a paradoxical effect, becoming the primary way that person is known, addressed, or referred to.

Tandy: I refuse to be called Tandy!
Everyone : Tandy is suffering from Tandy Syndrome.

Assface Syndrome

(Noun): An Irreversible affliction in which the person(s) constantly pretend to be completely fine with a person/situation, but are going through the motions while being an extreme hater without revealing it. See: Bun boy and Coward.

Caligulis Abnormis: Where hast my ceremonial Butt plug gotten to, Tristan?

Tristan Longpeath: Find it yourself, i'm not your slave.

Caligulis Abnormis: Fine. (While walking away, says): Dickhead.

Tristan Longpeath: Seems you have a terminal case of Assface Syndrome.

Avengers syndrome

The desire for the Avengers to save the world, caused by the psychological condition of only acknowledging a global threat to humanity once it enters Manhattan Island.

Thousands of alarmed New York Yankees fans experienced severe Avengers syndrome upon learning that the MLB would be suspended due to a viral outbreak.

Craft syndrome

Can't Remember A Fucking Thing syndrome.
usually happens more frequently the older you get.
happens in an instant, you are about to do something and all of a sudden you don't know what?

I went in to the kitchen to make dinner, and CRAFT Syndrome bites couldn't remember why, only just walked in to the room. left feeling confused.
Made a phone call when the person answered! Craft syndrome strikes again!!! cant remember why I called.

monie syndrome

a person who can’t spell nor make sense in their typing

monie syndrome example-
nobody:
monie: Thanks form future me Nd sure would I think he cute but hay he stop stoking me so