An egocentric goof that aspires to be a f*ckboy. A person that spends the day rummaging through garbage and fishing in a mud puddle by side of barn. Lives in board shorts and always has a bong in hand. This persons vocabulary is capped at 200 words. Like moldy cream cheese on a burnt bagel, this persons cocky jokes are unappetizing and stale.
(May or may not shower weekly)
This Douche bagel keeps repeating "Yo, Gintel you there?", it is not funny.
When the laziest most worthless person in the office walks with purpose and sighing around the office so everyone know they are there.
Did you see John do the douche bag drive by around the perimeter .
The brother of the girl you with.
Hey Hainer, is your brother the douche caboose coming with us?
When someone behaves very strangely after becoming a member of the church of scientology.
Tom Cruise use to be cool, until he became a Scientolo-Douche!
Douche Baggage- When someone has a good quality but also has one or more irredeemable traits that come along with them.
Randy has contributed so much to our hobby but he comes with a lot of douche baggage.
n. Boss of a company who requires employees to do the dumbest of tasks. Looks for jobs like taking rocks out of a ditch and then putting them back in. Thinks he has things all figured out, but really it's the workers who make sure all the jobs get done right. Contains the word "douche" because a Douche Tard wants people to think he's an asshole, but really that's all just for show. When no one's paying attention, you'll find Douche Tards cooing over baby fawn and such.
Jon: "Hey Benny, what job are we working on today?"
Benny: "We're filling that hole back in that you dug out yesterday."
Jon: "Whatever Douche Tard."
When a male/female orally pleasures a female whilst on her period until said period blood has vanished.
"Dude, did you fuck?"
"Ya, but she was on her period. I had to tongue douche her first."