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a fortune cookie that doesn't actually have a fortune in it, instead they package it with a lame statement like; Versatility is one of your greatest features.
Guy 1: Heh, what does you fortune cookie say?
Guy 2: Its not a fortune cookie its a goddamn statement cookie, it reads, " To understand a man, you must listen to his words."
Guy 1: Duh that's not only a statement, but its fucking obvious, more like a douche cookie.
39👍 3👎
A completely delicious substance that society prohibits us to bring to gatherings raw, so we are forced to bake it, therefore decreasing its deliciousness
Person 1: Cookie dough is far better than baked cookies
Person 2: Damn straight
205👍 30👎
Sarcastic response to someone who either boasts about something as if they deserve a reward for it, says something that nobody cares about but acts like everyone should, or says something that you can't really respond to. Rarely used IRL; most commonly used on internet forums.
Poster 1: I got a papercut yesterday.
Poster 2: ...Want a cookie?
341👍 53👎
When you eat lots of cookies of too many varieties, and thus require the use of reserve brain power to process said cookies
Person 1: i don't know i just say things, particularly now in my compromised mental state.
Person 2: sleep dep?
Person 1: in addition to cookie brain.
49👍 5👎
1) When the dutch oven is done baking
2) When you take a shit in someones bed and pull the sheets over their head
"I totally dutch cookie'd that girl the other day."
19👍 1👎
Dank weed distributed by old folks
gimme some o dem grandma cookies
10👍 1👎
A word my dad used to use when I was a kid, to verbalise crouching down for a pee in an area where a bathroom was not in the vicinity.
You need to go? Do you want to cookie-down by those trees over there? Just ignore the sheep.