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wanking face

The face one pulls while in the act of masterbating

Lol you should see martins wanking face, it looks like his seen a ghost and got a wheelbarrow up his ass

by mitch00uk March 31, 2015


Stealth Wank

A crafty wank thats done in a stealthy way; so as not to attract unwanted attention.

Pikey had a stealth wank in the park the other day whilst reading the newspaper.

by B13_Haters February 10, 2009


fandom wank

Both a noun and a verb.

1. Fannish absurdity, self importance, gratuitious grandiosity. Named for the community on journalfen.net.

2. to be the object of said community

1. Few friendships survive a good fandom wank.

2. After Mary Sue threatened to leave the Harry Potter fandom because her opus "When Harry met Mary" was laughed at, she was fandom wanked.

by minion of the Hive Vagina March 17, 2004


cheese wank

A term used to describe someone that not only is a wanker, but also a cheesy wanker. It does not mean that that person wanks off nor wanks off to cheese or with cheese. It just means that that person is a loser, douche bag, hated, etc.

Al: You know Bob from accounting? The one that kisses so much ass? He got promoted.

Jack: What?! What a fucking cheese wank. That makes me wanna T-bag him.

by Fonetix1 November 24, 2008


Wank Account

The ammount of semen held in reserve in one's testicles at any given point in time.

"I'm sorry sir. You are only allowed to make six withdrawals from your account per day"

by Vince Mincer June 07, 2005


preparatory wank

Jacking off before you get with your woman, so that you'll last longer before cumming.

I like to get in a preparatory wank before I pound my wife into the mattress, but I have to be careful or I won't be able to cum, just pump her dry pussy for an hour before giving up.

by Strokher Ace November 28, 2013


Quantum Wank

n. Masterbating whilst mentally reliving past sexual failures and "Trying to put right what once went wrong."

I totally blew it with the hot chick with the big jugs last night. She walked away 'to talk to her friends' and I knew she wasn't coming back. I ended having a Quantum Wank over her when I got home so my balls didn't explode. Those puppies weren't hard to forget!

by Lucky Bastard MK1 May 05, 2010