Shrek Screwdriver

A type of alcoholic drink, containing equal parts UV Blue vodka and OJ.
The mix of the blue vodka and orangy-yellow OJ makes a wonderful Shrek Green.
Hope you enjoy

Guy "Hey you want a Shrek Screwdriver?"
Other guy "Wouldn't have it any other way!"

Shrek hentai

Shrek hentai is when it’s anime shrek butt naked getting sexed on by another shrek

Dude did you like that shrek hentai I sent you? (Other guy) Yea dude!!! I unloaded about 67 Gallons of semen

shrek crocs

Aka the best shoes every

If you disagree — 😤

No one:
Shrek:
Let’s make amazing shoes for the whole word to wear (so considerate)

Making shrek crocs

Shrek

Shrek, the most pimp, most awesome, coolest guy in Florida. The most amazing person to come out of The University of West Florida.

I wish my boyfriend was more like Shrek.

4👍 48👎

Shrek Bird

A sexual act involving a minimum of 4 participants, one of whom being a girl.
The 3 men occupy the three main orphases and coordinate their movements so to simultaneously ejaculate 'filling' the female instantaneously. Thus expanding the female like the bird from shrek in the scene in which fiona sings until the bird expands and explodes.

dude 1: 'dude, shes fair hot'
dude 2: 'i reckon we should shrek bird her'
dude 1: 'ok me, you and who else?
dude 2: 'how bout garth?'

13👍 2👎

shrek is love

I was only 9 years old.
I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies.
I pray to Shrek every night, thanking him for the life I’ve been given. “Shrek is love” I say, “Shrek is life."
My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous of my devotion to Shrek.
I called him a cunt.
He hits me and sends me to sleep.
I'm crying now and my face hurts.
I lay in bed, really cold. I feel something warm...
It's Shrek! I was so happy.
He whispers in my ear "This is my swamp."
He grabs me with his ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I'm ready.
I spread my ass cheeks for Shrek.
He penetrates my butthole.
It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing and eyes watering.
I want to please Shrek.
He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love.
My dad walks in.
Shrek looks him straight in the eye and says,
"It's all ogre now."
Shrek leaves through my window.
Shrek is love. Shrek is life.

shrek is so cool!!

shrek is love, shrek is life

11👍 1👎

shrekking off

When you decide to Shrek your stick off like a psycho.

hey man did you hear about that one guy shrekking off?

9👍 1👎