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Mercantile Douche

A person who is incredibly annoying as a salesperson, clerk, or bartender. Someone who is a douche about how much they are charging for something.

Charging a lot of money for something is not what qualifies an individual as a mercantile douche. The individual must get upset and defensive when you challenge or inquire about the pricing schedule of their product. Basically they will be a dick when you ask about the price of something, and act like they are personally offended by your question. This description of an individual is especially poignant when the individual that is acting as a mercantile douche is not the individual who sets the prices or actually receives increased revenue from the pricing schedule.

Bar Patron: "Hi sir, why does this IPA only get a 12oz pour but the pale ale is 16oz?"
Mercantile Douche: {launches into lengthy diatribe about the cost of brewing beer and state laws about alcohol consumption. also uses condescending tone and has hipster mutton chops}
Bar Patron: "Geez man, I was just curious... I'll take a pale ale"
Mercantile Douche: {ignores social cue from patron that he doesn't want or need the lecture and continues his butthurt speech about why you should pay the same price for less on the IPA, eventually does poor beer}

"Wow, I just asked that bartender why the IPA cost a dollar more than the pale ale. He got super butthurt about defensive and started lecturing me about the cost of making beer. What a Mercantile Douche."

by kingofthedodge December 31, 2019


Bike Douche

A Bike Douche is the bicycle rider that wears the Tour de France onesie with sponsor logos and spends untold amounts of money on his bike. The Bike Douche will typically ride directly in the car traffic lane and not yield to any car. Bike Douches will be totally oblivious to the traffic jam they are causing and the danger they are placing themselves in. They sometimes will run in large Bike Douche packs with many rides in a douche road blocking formation taunting motorist to try and get around them. If provoke the Bike Douche pack may retaliate by surrounding your car and pounding their fists on your car.

I was late to work today because I was stuck behind a Bike Douche blocking the road.

by Theshoe8475 July 30, 2024


Douche Gilbertson

A term to describe someone who ruins the fun.

Timmy is really being a douche gilbertson.

by Dakota Rambler September 24, 2021


Satchel de douche

Upscale version of douche bag

Whoa that Gary is a real satchel de douche

by TMoneyID January 30, 2011


Hipster Douche

Repetitive.
Anyone claiming to be "a hipster" that thinks there is a difference between a hipster and a douche as if there's anything to love about hipsters. Or douches.

That guy is such a hipster douche. He gives hipsters a bad name.

by mbradleyc August 12, 2018


Douche Duty

A poor person that drives a super duty and is concerned about gas mileage.

Ted posts everyday in the Ford forums about mpg,
He’s such a douche duty

by Paul Schmitz March 21, 2022


Touche` Douche`

Nice come back douchebag
Oh it's on now
Insult duel

None for you whore,

Touche` douche`

by HighdeeAnne September 20, 2020