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When Lauren Boebert pegs Ted Cruz
I heard the Koch Brothers were serving a Colorado Pork Slider in Aspen
- Also called “reverse CPR”, this is commonly regarded as a sexual position similar to the lotus flower in which a couple sits in a river, stream, or large tub. One person sits up right with legs forward as the partner sits between the other’s legs and facing his/her partner. The second person then wraps his/her legs around the other while attempting to angle his/her anus towards the other so that both person’s anuses touch.
- With one person relaxed and a seal established, the other proceeds to fart into the anus of the other; similar to the mouth-to-mouth resuscitation technique taught in CPR classes.
- For added safety and maximum benefit, fill tub with water or jello to improve seal and assist with gas leak detection.
- *NOTE: not to be confused with the Colorado Gas Line Charge in which a tube is inserted into both anuses and the couple proceeds to fart into each other’s rectums in an attempt to “charge” each other’s line
If you need your partner to “warm your soul” ask for the Colorado Gasline
Young voices of Colorado is a fairly terrible choir housed by depressed children. Especially the signature gorls as they are yelled at daily.
Young Voices of Colorado taught me many life lessons such as bottling up your breakdowns until you are physically incapable of emotion.
When one eats the garter off the bride then shoots it out during the night then slides it back on the wife to finish the last nights dance
I pulled the Colorado o-ring off then took a dump after a snack then slid it back on for our final dance
The difference between the higher price you pay in an adult use dispensaries and the lower black market rate for equivalent goods.
Guy 1: "Man I could use some bud."
Guy 2: "Lets hit the pot shops, shits legal now."
Guy 1: "No, I gotta wait for my dealer to get back to me, I cant afford the Colorado mark up."
When one c*ms in a condom, freezes said condom, then used it as an butt plug.
A deer that randomly came out on the road and got ran over
1: Was that a speed bump?
2: Yeah, the Colorado speed bump