Two Shakes of a Lamb’s Tail

A term most commonly used amongst the sexually active elderly to describe a gentleman who’s pubic hair has gone white, long and untamed - completely hiding his penis, visually resembling the tail of a lamb. He gives his lady one pump in her front door and one pump in her back door (two shakes) before losing his erection and calling it a night. His lady is less than satisfied, but it’s better than nothing.

“Bernie, are you and Irene coming to bingo?”
“No, I’ve gotta get this bitch home to give her Two Shakes of a Lamb’s Tail. See you next week, if we’re not dead yet.”

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two shakes of a lambs tail

a short amount of time

i will be down in two shakes of a lambs tail

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two shakes of a lamb's tail

Colloquial phrase representing an undefined short time period

I'll be there in two shakes of a lamb's tail

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kiss the lamb between the ears

It means when you ask someone to suck your dick. (Take out your pockets and those are the ears, then between is your dick)

Hey girl wanna kiss the lamb between the ears?

two shakes of a lambs tail

Soon. Originally from areas in Yorkshire and Wales. Spread throughout the Southern Hemisphere in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries, mostly in parts of Australia and the whole of New Zealand.

Kiwi #1, "Hey bru, have you finished with that beautiful young sheep? Is it my turn yet?"
Kiwi #2, "Yeah cuz, just gimme two shakes of a lamb's tail to clean myself up here. Primo Flossy."

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two shakes of a lamb's tail

1. a slang phrase meaning a short period of time.
2. all that it takes to get some people to mount a sheep.

1. "i'll have that coffee out in two shakes of a lamb's tail!"
2. " did you see that! i think it likes me!"

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Mary Had a little Lamb

Where the money reside. Head bitch in charge, everyone else follows.

That’s on Mary had a little lamb

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