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Stone job: Pronounced {STONE-JOB!}
Believed to be derived of Spanish and English origins, with its true beginnings shrouded in a history as odd as the act itself.
a) The act of inadvertently neglecting to keep prearranged meetings.
b) The act of absentmindedly abandoning a friend(s) at a house party, without informing said friend(s) of your abrupt departure.
c) The unintended failure to return phone calls for hours, sometimes days and even months on end.
Although the earliest known occurrences are believed to have been committed by a single male in his youth, the term and action have played out over the course of time to include all forms of life.
After years of research and observation it is proven to be an involuntary response to some of, but not limited to, the following: a) self-absorption b) aloofness c) carelessness d) drunkenness e) smoking to much fucking weed.
While a STONE JOB is not malicious in nature, it can be emotionally detrimental to the unsuspecting victim. Without a proper understanding of a STONE JOB it can leave its target with feelings of disorientation, despair, resentment, and depression, some of the effected casualties have reported mild to acute cases of anger, rage, and hatred. In most cases the discomfort subsides within one or two days, but can last in excess of a week depending on the severity of the affliction.
It was thought to be a lost practice until its reemergence in Riverhead, New York, sometime around the mid to late eighties.
Example:
Guy one: Hey, how was the Slayer concert?
Guy two: I don't know Eric never picked me up from work.
Guy one: oh man STONE JOB huh?
Guy two: yeah, but one day I will get even...
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When you stick your dick so far up a girls ass it goes in her intestine when it dose it will make you wanna cum beacuse of how good and slippery it feels
hey baby guess what)(what ) * pulls out dick and puts in butt* (omg jorge thats sooo good thats an intestine job
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The young man refused to allow his date to give him a dry job, for he feared of penal blisters.
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Oral sex involving the sphincter.
Or
When your fuck buddy tongues your ass.
A.K.A.- tossing the saladanalingus
The Dude: She licked my Cockall the way down to my balls then dove down for the Rim Job and finished me off with a Rusty Trombone...
Dick: Good God man... What did you do!?!
The Dude: I asked her to marry me right then and there.
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How well one does at blowing high ranking Republican officials. Swallowing is a must. Usually results in an appointment as bureau chief of some federal agency. Must achieve this score at least twice to head become Attorney General.
Dubya rated Brownie's fantastic hummer on national television. "Heck of a job," Dubya proclaimed, and Brownie beamed like Thomas the Tank Engine. Normally this would mean CEO of some defense or drug company at the end of the administration, but unfortunately it was during the Katrina disaster. Brownie's chances for that were severely curtailed. Not that Brownie minded, but he would have to receive his perks through the back door.
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The act of kissing and licking someone's asshole
Kiersten : Last night Jake gave me an amazing Rim Job before he fucked my pussy!
Kaylee : Sounds gross what if you had shit in his mouth!
Kiersten : Oh my Jake wouldn't mind he would eat my shit with a spoon!
Steve : Hey Kaylee heard you talking about shit would you like a Rim Job?
Kaylee : Fuck No You Disgusting Pig!
Steve : Ok but could you shit in a bowl so I can eat it cause I would eat your shit with a spoon!
Kiersten : Wow Kaylee I think Steve really likes you! LOL
Kaylee : Damn't Kiersten will you please keep your sex stories to yourself!
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The official mixed drink of IGN's The Knockin' Boots podcast; made with orange crush or orange sunkist soft drink & Captain Morgan's rum
Daemon: Hey Greg, please make me a drink.
Greg: You want a Rum Job?
Daemon: I want a Rum Job
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