"A paper towel folded into a paper football!" The main purpose of the "Van Gleason" is to be positioned between your ass hole and grundle, and locked into your butt cheeks preventing chaffing, sorness, and possible leakage.
Directions: Make a paper football out of a paper towel (choose how thick or thin you want your "Van Gleason" to be.) Proceed to place the "Van Gleason" under your anus to your grundle. Lock the "Van Gleason" into place between your butt cheeks. Enjoy the temporary relief!
THAT "VAN GLEASON" REALLY HELPED TO PROVIDE TEMPORARY RELIEFE TO MY RAW GRUNDLE
Preferred mode of transportation for Matt Gaetz (R-FL). Seen frequently around high school proms, malls, and other locations minors are present.
Matt Gaetz drove home from Washington in his chomo van so he could enjoy his favorite pastime of raping 13 year old girls at the mall in Pensacola.
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The elaborate anti-theft system involving the suspension of a midget from the roof of a van with chastity paddles duct taped to each of its limbs. This will result in a thief being incapacitated by a flurry of very angry strikes.
NB. The midget can also be used to fulfill kinky 21 yr old boys' fantasies.
I have a midget in a van *wink wink*.
Brother of Vincent Van Gogh, who instead of cutting off his ear like his brother, proceeded to cut off his Dick. No one remembers Van Heaux because he was a terrible painter.
If you want to be famous, you have to have talent like Vincent Van Gogh, not just cut off your body parts like his brother Van Heaux.
The greatest group of people ever!
The God Van is rolling through
where you have one arm more tanned than the other, like a white van driver who always had his window down and arm out resting on the door in the sun.
Damnit, I put more fake tan on one arm than the other, its a right van tan!