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Random
the time of the month when a woman is menstruating.
Darling, I have good news and I have bad news. The bad news is that we can't have sex. The good news is that at least it is National Blow Job Week.
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When a girl felashes you and the next day you are unable to walk properly. This unpleasant experience is due to the constant scraping of incisors upon one's penis. When this occurs, "going commando" is imperative because even the most comfortable boxers feel like a paper shredder.
My mom asked me if I hurt my knee but the cause of my limp was a blow job from hell.
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When you are sitting in class and keep nodding off so that your head slides forward and then you jerk back awake so that it looks like you're giving a blow job to the invisible person in front of you.
"I saw you over there giving the ghost a blow job"
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When you try to talk to a girl and she puts in her ipod ear buds.
dude, I was totally gonna talk to this girl but I got cock blocked by steve Jobs!
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When you take a girl that looks like shrek out to the car and while she is giving you head you puke out the window of the car. (Bay City Michigan has more bars per capita than any other city in the US)
Dan just had a few shots and took that chick out back for a Bay City Blow Job.
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When it becomes very obvious that a female went to a private school rather than a state school...via fellatio.
Man, she was cool until that private school blow job came down.
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A man ejaculates on a woman's dark hair roots and follows this with the wiping of his penis on her eyebrows.
The Jersey Bleach Job (JBJ)can only be accomplished with a brunette woman who has attempted to dye her hair blond and presently has dark roots showing through her faux blond hair. Usually, it is attempted in the parking lot of a NY Giants or NY Jets football game while tailgating and drinking excessively.
Upon the onset of the male orgasm, the man directs his ejaculatory discharge into the woman's dark roots in a manner similar to the process undertaken when hair stylists re-color these dark roots. After sufficiently covering her dark roots with his ejaculate, the man then proceeds to wipe off the tip of his member on her dark eyebrows in a futile attempt to dye the eyebrows blond as well.
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