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Mexican Olympics-
If someone ever tells you that "you pulled off the Mexican Olympics";
Its another way of saying that you beat the Devil at his own game.
The Mexican Olympics is the most extreme sport of survival there is, it puts the gameshow "Survivor" to shame.
Starting out inside Mexico, the Mexican Olympics begin as soon as you cross the border into United States of America by any means necessary.
Crossing the border is not the hard part, it's staying inside America by avoiding detection is the hard part.
Strategies include gambling, obtaining fake ID's, and moving to a different address and possibly a different state every year to avoid getting shot or detected by I.C.E. and/or Border Patrol.
To win the Gold in the Mexican Olympics, please enlist in the military with a pseudo identification, fake identification or someone else's identification.
By serving in the military it is a great way to earn American citizenship,if caught, stay silent.
If you are suspected as a spy, it's not the end of the world, you can become "doubled" or a double agent. Always claim you are a persecuted minority in your home country.
Being classified as "White" sure does help alot in avoid detection and deportation. If so always claim as an "Albino" or "Al-Beano"if you speak any foreign language other than English.
Person 1-"You pulled off the Mexican Olympics!"
Person 2-"You been in this country for so long that we don't have any identification of you."
Person 3-" The guy even has the Medal Of Honor by giving enough information to kill Osama Bin Laden during his brief military service."
Person 4- "We know you are not speaking Spanish when you speak but it sure helps you being around Spanish Speakers and act like you having a conversation together, good job on learning English fast."
Person 5-"You actually deserve to be an American Citizen."
Got horny and bored and decided to use my chihuahua as a Mexican sex doll
Getting hair and makeup done for holidays by professionals
“Maria isn’t a fancy Mexican, she’s just regular”
Balancing a shot glass on the tip of a penis while pouring a shot and then ramming it in some dudes ass
Poor charlie recieved a mexican flamingo durring a night out with the boys....he was never the same after that
Those mexican eagles will eat anything rotten off the ground and then turn around and throw up on your ass.
a Mexican meat shank is a type of shank where you use your penis and tape razor blades on it.
I hit Jackson with my Mexican meat shank.
When you pay a bunch of trumpet-wielding musicians to serenade your girlfriend but she goes home with them when it's over.
Pete: "Dude, my girlfriend went home with this trumpet player after I paid him to serenade her on the street!"
Brad: "Bummer dude, classic Mexican Reversal."