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Making negative comment about oneself expecting a positive and opposite rmark from another
Nicholas: I'm fat
Bob: Yes you are, I'm not falling for that Emotional Masturbation
Nicholas: *Cries olive oil tears*
Your emotional algorithm, is a subconscious selection process that is choosing the wrong the person for you. You overlook the red flags because are so familiar that they feel like home. Possibly the same red flags as one of your parents.
Me sobbing during a break up - Gawd! I can't believe I ended up with another prick who treats me like garbage! My emotional algorithm must be broken. What is wrong with me?
When a large group of people have the same reactions (to a sporting event, horror movie, cute cat video) at the exact same time without advanced planning.
"I have no idea what they were watching on her laptop, but their synchronized emoting told me that it was gross from all the gasps and 'ew's I heard."
A person or object that bring positive emotional value to a relationship or environment.
Kaitlin is an emotional asset, I feel great whenever she is around me, she brings me pure joy and wide smiles.
When someone makes a sarcastic joke with their emotions.
Bob:"Hey, Sarah, wanna come hang out?"
Sarah:"Fuck no, you asshat! I hate your fucking guts!"
Bob: :'(
Sarah: "SARCASM WITH EMOTIONS!!!"
(noun): Similar to the food product Tofu which generates no original flavor but absorbs flavor from surrounding products, Emotional Tofu is a person with no actual experience in a topic but knows, or knows of, someone who has experience in a cause, so they absorb their emotion as their own.
Seen mostly in white, middle/upper class, priveledged, Social Justice Warriors when they're trying to justify their political views. Typically identified by using sentences that start with "I have a friend who.."
Veteran: Yeah I think the inroads made in Iraq post-exit in 2011 have had mostly long term benefits for the region despite setbacks with ISIL's rise
Emotional Tofu: No it isn't! No! You don't understand. I have friend. He was in Iraq. He caught PTSD and that's why universal health insurance and stronger gun control because fuck you Trump!
Felling butt hurt and bent. Got kicked in the va-jay-jay. Panties in a wad. Depressed and sad. All delivered to you by your local bully and/or ass kicker.
Dude gave him an emotional wedgie, now he's acting like a little bitch about everything.