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Touch Helmets

When two manly men hug naked and there erect penises meet each others German Helmets. When two penis heads touch.

Hey Brad, You wanna go out back and touch helmets.

by Brosnatch August 8, 2010

6๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


touch base

To make contact; to cover all the possibilities. Comes from baseball where the runners need to touch the base to make a run legal. Mostly used by asshat supervisors who do no real work, but constantly engage in meta-communication.

Boss: "I'm just calling you to make sure we touch base."
Worker: "Alright, what do we need to discuss?"
Boss: "Well the first thing we need to do is touch base."
Worker: "So the point of this call is to have a call?"
Boss: "Exactly. That's why touching base is so important."
Worker: *muttered* "Go to hell, you recursive asshat."

by Scroatsky April 6, 2008

217๐Ÿ‘ 129๐Ÿ‘Ž


iPod Touch

A super skinny iPod that can slip between the cracks in a couch, causing it to be lost for hours. This may cause people to flip the fuck out, literally cry like real liquid tears, and break lamps. If the girlfriend is the reason it got lost, it may result in both parties getting negative ass.

iPod touch owner: "dude i have to move the couch to find my iPod"
MOVES TABLE, THUS KNOCKING OVER LAMP
House owner: "alright, move the couch right into the fucking glass table!@!#$^&*"

iPod Touch owner: Wah wah wah!!!!!

Everyone else in the house: "Hhahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahaha"

by Chorg October 19, 2009

283๐Ÿ‘ 175๐Ÿ‘Ž


touching cloth

When the head of your brown trout is appearing unbidden on-deck. When the nose of the turtle's head is beginning to rub on the undergarments you are currently wearing.

I'm sorry your Majesty, I may have to leave abruptly as I'm touching cloth...

by Surgeon_General and Steed April 26, 2003

76๐Ÿ‘ 41๐Ÿ‘Ž


touch base

Most appropriately a business expression originating approximately 40-years-ago derived from the sport of baseball. During that time it was a novel and well accepted slang for the purpose of getting-in-touch with someone over any form of matter. By 1990, it became so over used to the point of becoming a corny expression eventually leading to the use mostly by an asshat as described. Today, such an expression is regarded practically as an insult for this very reason and is taken as a form of senseless needling, often meant to offend one's intelligence.

The only businesses who have become notorious for the term are financial institutions where, in fact, new employees are actually taught to use it in the form of customer psychology as it belittles the status of the borrower in relation to the lender, e.g., reminding the customer who the lender is and that they are in debt.

"Hi, John, this is Lois at Bullshit Finance! Just wanted to touch base and see how you are?"

by Ipana May 2, 2009

88๐Ÿ‘ 49๐Ÿ‘Ž


getting a touch

To get acknowledgement or inclusion from any one person or group by means of sexual relations, facebook, events, or any form of communication.

I love getting a touch from my girl

by bfitz311 August 22, 2010

20๐Ÿ‘ 8๐Ÿ‘Ž


angel's touch

When you are peeing or shitting and your dick touches the urinal / toilet where other dicks probably have been.

I was shitting comfortably when suddenly my dick feels cold like an angel's touch.

by YoungJanitor October 8, 2015

5969๐Ÿ‘ 4264๐Ÿ‘Ž