bike beast

A biker who squids, always does wheelies, gets mad at everyone on the road when they don’t see them speeding, breaks mirrors, runs from cops, flips people off, rev bombs and generally is very idiotic on a motorcycle. Usually seen on a crotch rocket or supermoto and in large groups where everyone is breaking the law.

*Turns in front of motorcycle 5 blocks away*
*Biker speeds up and punches mirror off then does a wheelie while flipping off the car*
Car driver: WOW that asshole broke my mirror.
Car passenger: Fucking bike beast.

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bike swelling

When you go bicycling on an uncomfortable bike seat and you get some swelling on your butt and perineum.

Santa Claus: Hey Jesus, want to go shoot some hoops?
Jesus: Sorry but I can't...I went bicycling yesterday and now I've got bike swelling.

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Mountain Biking

Going off road on a bike without a seat but with a 12 inch plus dry seat post only.

Hey Nick, what are you up to today? Mountain Biking...I have About 13 inches on my dry seat post and I think Astroglyde wants to sponsor me. Im a real man!

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The Bike Racks

A benign threat used to end an adolescent style argument. Often followed by a random future time.

Friend 1: "Princess Leia in her slave outfit is much hotter than Laura Croft!"

Friend 2: "No way!"

Friend 1: "That's it. The bike racks, 3 o'clock!"

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bike-sexual

Unlike guys who like gals, guys, or guys and gals; bike-sexual guys are only into bikes.

"I'm into him but it seems like he's not into me. At first I thought he was stuck on his x-girlfriend but now I think he's just bike-sexual"

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scraper bike

A relatively recent phenomenon from the Bay area (specifically Oakland) in which people modify bicycles to resemble (either functionally, aesthetically or philosophically) the famed "scrapers" of the hyphy movement.

Man, you see the homemade spinners on that scraper bike? Shit is tight!

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Bike Pikey

Bike Pikey
A Bike Pikey is someone that is unwilling or unable to own bike components of any significant value. Usually due to a lack of understanding or appreciation of the actual mechanistic or engineering properties inherent in most expensive items.

Bike Pikey's often feel it necessary to criticise those who can either afford or appreciate expensive, top-end components.

"Why bother £40 FOR GEAR CABLE ooh they have shiny metal bits wow and there's even a German link and they make drastic improvements!"

- Example of a Bike Pikey whining.

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