First World Problems

When the only people you can talk to are your best friend and a sexy blonde...

Disney princesses have some real first world problems!

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First World Problems

Problems almost unique to or prevalent in the first world, which actually refers to the US. These problems include:
- medical debt
- extreme poverty
- identity theft
- credit card fraud
- fake news
- queueing forever in cars for “fast food” and coffee
- conspiracy theories
- gun violence
- normalised bigotry and misogyny
- institutionalised corruption
- extreme bureaucracy

It took forever to get my gronday lartay with that line of cars … dang first world problems!

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her eggs her problem

her eggs her problem is what you say when there’s nothing you can do about a situation.

You: Man I really wish I wouldn’t have missed the bus this morning.
Me: Oh well, her eggs her problem I guess.

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I think that's a you problem.

A cleaner way to say "I didn't cause this, you did bitch." Sometimes used when you are boiling with anger but are in front of someone but do not want to say anything bad so you just fabricate this sentance.

Person 1; Dude why the hell did you not help me cheat during the test?!!? I failed all cause of you!
(Person 2's christian friends are watching)
Person 2; Shut the fuck u- I think that's a you problem.

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White People Problems

A general term used to describe the piss poor priorities of upper/middle class citizens in developed countries, as they complain more about ridiculous over exaggerated bullshit (like marriage, where to eat, how to eat, getting their clothes messy) than actually trying to solve any of the real issues in the world like debt, starvation, corrupt governments, equality, diseases, poverty, etc.

Examples of White People Problems vs actual issues:
Average American Citizen:
"OMFG I Got grass stains on my white shoes! These are unwearable! I can't walk out in public like this!"

(He then throws the shoes away)
Homeless person who does not have shoes :"What the fuck are you bitching about"

White people issues in the royal family:
Prince: "Bloody mary, I need to find a woman, if I do not then the entire government will fall" (he then finds one and broadcasts the shit to the media)
Refugee Who escaped from a corrupt middle-eastern regime: "What the fuck are you bitching about?"

Another example is the Trump campaign.

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Cause Boris a Problem

To take a shit in the fair city of London.

Reference to the new mayor of London Boris Johnson. Causes him a problem because you are at risk of blocking the Thames.

Aww...Man I gotta go cause Boris a Problem

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Tool-Problem Ratio ("TPR")

Also known as the Aargh Quotient, the Tool-Problem Ratio (“TPR”) is a DIY term expressing the relationship between a physical problem to be fixed and the tool available for the task. A 1:1 ratio reflects that the tool is perfect for the job -- e.g., when a nail clipper is available to trim a toenail, the TPR is 1:1. Ratios of greater than 1:1 indicate that the tool available is excessive relative to the job: a chainsaw generates a ratio of, say, 200:1 for toenail trimming. Ratios of less than 1:1 indicate that the tool at hand is inadequate for the task: a toenail clipper produces a ratio of, say, 1:1000 for cutting down a Christmas tree. Depending on the TPR, responsive behaviors may range from mild (swearing, sighing disgustedly), to driving to the hardware store, to breaking the workpiece or the tool violently.

Faced with a Tool-Problem Ratio ("TPR") of about 1:10 when his flat-blade screwdriver was too big to loosen the Phillips-head screw on his range vent, Bob intoned “Jesus H. Christ” under his breath and motored off to Home Depot.