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Giving ones self the dutch rudder in order to avoid the guilt of blowing a load and becoming impure. This way it can be claimed you have not hammered on yourself. In the line of weird ways to avoid impurity, it is below soaking.
I was about to mormon masturbate before passing out when Jane walked in and told me she was down to soak.
16👍 12👎
The age where mormons will finally date (16)
"that new boy is so cute!"
"i heard he was a mormon."
"damn. i wish i was mormon legal!"
6👍 3👎
WHEN YOU LURE UNSUSPECTING MORMON GIRLS BANGING ON YOUR DOOR INTO YOUR HOME AND DO HORRIBLE THINGS.
WOW, I HEARD IT WAS A MORMON BANG OVER THERE WHERE THE POLICE CARS ARE
6👍 3👎
Magic White full body underwear used to ward off evil in all forms. Though failure rates are never discussed, all Mormons will have a story about someone who was miraculously unharmed during a disaster, but primarily the areas protected by the underwear.
Mormon underwear must always be worn under clothes, at almost all times. If you are not already a Mormon, you are not allowed to purchase it.
All Mormon underwear carry only 2 symbols, which are directly attributed to the Free Mason's as that was a group Joseph Smith was associated with prior to starting this religion.
AKA, garments, Magic Underwear
There was a guy who was fixing a boiler in the temple when it exploded. Everything covered by the Mormon Underwear was saved.
69👍 75👎
sweet, cute, respectable young gentlemen...who love their religion and devote their lives for 2 years riding around like little goofs wearing suits on bicycles and going to peoples houses everday spreading the mormon religion and 9/10 times getting rejected......but good luck tryna date one, they only wanna date mormon girls, and they only date girls they might wanna marry in the future...they dont really hook up... LITTLE CUTIES.
doorbell rings
a mom: its those mormons trying to preach their religion to us for the 10th time.... dont get it!!!
a daughter: looks through door peepholedaaaayuuumn that blonde mormon missionary is finnne!!!!!!!!!!!! come on in!!!!!!
153👍 182👎
Also known as a "Kohler". A mormon whore is a mormon girl or boy who hooks up with a lot of different people and makes others believe they are not actually mormon until they have the opportunity to have sex, or engage in sexual activity, in which they have to decline.
"Thay boy is such a mormon whore! We made out and he was gettin' into it, but then I wanted to go further and he said "no"."
23👍 20👎
Mormon hair is caused by backcombing the hair into large ratty looking chunks, then you pull the top half back into a messy looking rats nest. This look is usually found on teenaged mormon girls, and occasionally their mothers go for the same look.
God I am so sick of all this mormon hair.
46👍 49👎