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Jonas

Derived from Yonah (Hebrew meaning "Dove" or Sign of God, and also means 'The Doer') and translated through the Greek Ionas to the present Jonas. The Lithuanian name Jonas was independently derived from the name 'John' which means either a client of prostitutes or a device you sit on to crap.

Also a namesake book in the old testament depicting a prophet's involuntary ingurgitation by gigantic marine wildlife as part of a divine motivational technique program.

Also a reason for screaming adolescent girls to wet their drawers, and for lame rock bands to write mediocre songs in sappy 3/4 time signatures.

(The Doer) "You see that girl, I'd like to Jonas."
(The Dove) (In the shower( "Honey, do we have another bar of Jonas under the sink?"
(Sign of God) "I neglected to read the Jonas on the freeway and missed my exit to the Billy Graham talk."

by JonasOfToronto April 30, 2009

324πŸ‘ 384πŸ‘Ž


Jonas

A uncommon name.
Although now commonly used in band names.

Often mispelled or misunderstood

Me: You listen to that song by Weezer? Its called My Name Is Jonas
You: Wtf?

In-And-Out worker: What is your name?
Jonas: Jonas
In-And-Out worker: Jones...Joe?, your order is ready!

by MyNameIsJonas August 15, 2006

400πŸ‘ 493πŸ‘Ž


Jonas

Jonas has the ass that will make you go insane for the rest of your entire fucking life. He may be a little toxic, but if he isn't toxic to you, you know he is a keeper. Jonas makes you go insane in the membrane, and insane in the brain, whether you are a boy or a girl. This guy is a keeper, because you know he has a stack of whole milk whenever you need it. But what a faggot

Jonas is such a hottie, it's too bad that he isn't single

by Penis Lover 212 April 15, 2019

15πŸ‘ 9πŸ‘Ž


jona

a word that refers to a beautiful girl that is extremely honest and decent - not a whore even though a large number of people want to get with her.

Damn, shes such a jona! i wish she wasnt so hard to get.

hmm, i wish i could get with her, but shes a jona!

by this*is*my*name*bitches April 3, 2007

237πŸ‘ 312πŸ‘Ž


Jona

Jona ist sehr dΓ€hmlich er geht auf die Baumschule und tanzt seinen Namen

Sein IQ ist -30000000 niemand will die jona Seuche bekommen jeder verabscheut ihn

Jona: Hallo ich bin Jona

Person 1: Hilfe ich will sterben

by Joh CeeenA January 4, 2017

4πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Jonas

The name given to a widely popular boy-band who have billions of screaming and crying over-fanatic fans. Usually used in the tween group expressions.

"Oh My Jonas"

by Ohh, JB LOVE. March 21, 2009

244πŸ‘ 378πŸ‘Ž


jonas

faggot gay ass bitch

jonas is a gay ass faggot

by jonas is gay February 18, 2020

12πŸ‘ 13πŸ‘Ž