can my cat watch?

"Can my cat watch?" is what not to say when you're on a first date and getting some action.

They had just made it to the bedroom, and Helena was taking her top off when Bryce asked, "Can my cat watch?"

Bryce slept alone with his cat that night.

11👍 3👎

my cat scratched me

A common excuse used to devoid attention from a mark residing on your arm or thigh, often caused by self-harm rather than an unstable cat.

“what’s that?”
“my cat scratched me.”

8👍 2👎

Daddy Fucked My Cat

I need fucking therapy.

Daddy fucked my pussy, bitch.

Johnny: Hey, I’m daddy now.
Step sis: alright, what are you doing stepbro?
Johnny: Daddy is gonna fuck you in the cat.

Two hours later
Step sis: Daddy fucked my cat!

3👍 4👎

My cat has ocd

A joke about sh

"How do I describe my mental health? uhhhhhh... My cat has ocd."

I ate my cat

When you feel awkward and don’t know what to say

Hey? I ate my cat yesterday

Wanna see my cat?

Wanna see my cat? is a slang word used to say you wanna fuck

You and Jungkook went out for your first appointment
When you arrive at your house, you say "Hey, ehm... Wanna see my cat?"
Jungkook: "Oh, yes, I take with me the condom"

11👍 17👎

Ima put my cat on the mic

MEOOOOOOWWWW

Kid: Ima put my cat on the mic

Kid: MEOOOOOOWWWW

24👍 1👎