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Performing monkey

Someone that would do anything to keep the guy/girl they like happy. Also involves doing almost anything that they ask without thinking and putting their needs before their own.

Steve asked me to work out his overtime for the past 6 months while I was flat out at work

Wow and you did it? Are you his performing monkey or something?!

by Pizzacat0987654321 June 5, 2014

14👍 2👎


Faulks Performance

A nutter'ish but none the less highly skilled person who builds very fast Saabs

You need some Faulks Performance on that

Thats been Faulks'ed

by In Awe July 24, 2004

9👍 1👎


Performance Anxiety

the feeling of panic, utter helplessness, and ineptitude, when someone is looking over your shoulder and you are trying to show them something on your computer

Mary had complete performance anxiety trying to navigate to the correct folder to show Jim the correct spreadsheet.

by Happy Girly of course! February 23, 2010

37👍 10👎


performance guy

A avid cyclist who rodes a carbon bike, shaves is leg, wears a nice bike team kit, takes electrolytes, and hates everything else related to bike that does not match his profile. Expression popularized by cyclist/youtuber Robin Moore with his song "Performance".

Julia: I thought about you today, I saw a performance guy on Route 1.
Al: Cool! What kit was he wearing?
Julia: Not sure but he was freaking fast on a sparkling 2010 Trek Madone.

by RealFast March 14, 2010

21👍 5👎


performance pay

A form of pay used by some greedy employers to fuck it's hard working employees out of their pay while still showing record growth for the share holders and allowing the co to recive massive pay raises

Indra .I'm gonna fuck these employees or you could just give them performance pay boss lady. It's much better

by cheesy one September 20, 2016


erectile performance

{n.} The degree to which a male possesses the capacity for raising a flaccid, favorite organ to an upright or distended positon (e.g., a man's "sleeping" penis or -- as is the case with a male sage grouse or frigatebird -- an uninflated gular sac).

EXAMPLE:

' A unique physical feature of male great frigate birds was also bound to attract the attention of immature human males concerned with erectile performances of their own sex organs. Each male great frigate bird at mating time tried to attract the attention of females by inflating a bright red balloon at the base of his throat. At mating time, a typical rookery when viewed from the air resembled an enormous party for human children, at which every child had received a red balloon. The {Galápagos} island would in fact be paved with male great frigate birds with their heads tilted back, their qualifications as husbands inflated by their lungs to the bursting point—while, overhead, the females wheeled.

' One by one the females would drop from the sky, having chosen this or that red balloon.

" After Mary Hepburn showed her film about the great frigate birds, some student, . . . almost invariably a male, was sure to ask, sometimes clinically, sometimes as a comedian, sometimes bitterly, hating and fearing women: "Do the females always try to pick the biggest ones?"

' So Mary was ready with a reply: "To answer that, we would have to interview female great frigate birds, and no one has done that yet, so far as I know. Some people have devoted their lives to studying them, though, and it is their opinion that the females are in fact choosing the red balloons which mark the best nesting sites. " '

-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1985 novel "Galápagos" -- Ch. 20 (p. 114).

by Dinkum August 24, 2013


proven performer

A woman who, by virtue of having a baby with her, or is undeniably pregnant, has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is not a virgin. She has put out. At least once.

James: How bout that girl over there?

Greg: Naw, man, she's pushing a stroller.

James: C'mon! That just means she's a proven performer!

by Bructus January 21, 2011