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military manlet

The military manlet is an overcompensating manlet boy who, in a fit of Napoleon complex-induced insanity, has signed up for active duty with the United States Armed Forces. Here the useless and effeminate manlets are generally used as cannon fodder when deployed in the absurd spectacle known as the manlet wave attack tactic, but can also be traded as war brides, serve as portable human shields or can be used as an emergency fortification when stacked up as a barricade in lieu of sandbags. The military manlet is always keen to raise the morale of the actual soldiers in his platoon by donning an Oompa Loompa costume and dancing a merry jig atop a mess hall table as the surrounding military manlets clap in unison while dancing in a circle like the fairies that they are and all the manmores pelt him with height boosting insoles. As an encore Manletlyn Monroe performs smash hits such as "High Heels Are A Manlets Best Friend" and "Bye Bye Masculinity" to further entertain the troops.

Why is that pantsed military manlet lying face down in the mud over there? The silly sissy manlet broke one of his high heels while prancing around on the obstacle course and threw a hissy fit, so the real soldiers just left him there. Never leave a man behind - that obviously doesn't apply to manlets.

by ManletDepreciator August 22, 2024


Short People manlet gang

A grotesquely gnomish gaggle of ganged-up, overcompensating turbo-manlets who have, in a childish, desperate and doomed attempt at overcoming their crippling manletism, decided to form a midget gang. Once a diminutively dwarfed new recruit has been sexed-into the gang, it is mandatory for him to participate in typical gang activities, for example: tagging up turf by spray-painting garden gnomes at knee height onto garbage cans and pet doors, drinking Tall Boys and huffing Jenkem, prancing around naked except for high heels and assless chaps in their hobbit-hole of a gang hideout while towel snapping each other's posteriors in an effort to toughen themselves up, telling deeply embarrassing tall tales about how they used to be the biggest kid in preschool, injecting themselves with stolen bovine somatotropin in a futile and injudicious bid at escaping their inevitable fate of becoming a prison wife manlet once caught by the law and incarcerated and frantically praying in front of the countless Randy Newman posters adorning the walls of the manlet pit in their hobbit-hole gang hideout while repetitively reciting the lyrics of their favorite song Short People due to their shared obsession with the delusional hope of being blessed with an adult-onset growth spurt by their beloved God and hero Saint Newman.

Jessica: Lol, why are there a bunch of garden gnomes standing on the corner over there? Olivia: It's just a Short People manlet gang. Here, take my magnifying glass and have a closer look. Can you see that they got little hands, little eyes, that they walk around tellin' great big lies? They got little noses and tiny little teeth. Unsurprisingly they wear platform shoes on their nasty, little feet. Jessica: Oh yeah, they got little baby legs and they stand so low - I'd have to pick one of them up just to say hello! Olivia: Well, I don't want no short people 'round here. Jessica: Short people got no reason.

by ManletDepreciator September 11, 2024


Manlet rage

Standing in stark contrast to the manlet's stunted, diminutive and girlish stature, manlet rage involves gigantic amounts of hatred, self-loathing, bitterness and desperation. Due to the horrendous mortification of manletism, the petite and effeminate manlet is extremely short-tempered, small-minded and eternally unable to be the bigger man. This deeply insecure and shameful behavior leads to countless interpersonal conflicts in the microscopic manlet's tortured existence which often result in manlet rage.

Why is that little boy throwing a tantrum in front of the escalator over there? Manlet detected. I think one of his high heels just broke. Lol, manlet rage - how immature! That silly manlet clearly needs to grow up before he speaks up.

by ManletDepreciator August 9, 2024


megachurch manlet

A megachurch manlet is a massively delusional microscopic manlet boy who senselessly, sinfully and insolently dares to sully the sanctity of the house of the Lord with his abominable attendance, thereby bringing upon himself inexorable divine wrath because it clearly states in the Bible in Leviticus 21:20 that no dwarf shall draw near the temple. For shame! The sacrilegious sissy manlet would be well-advised to sacrifice himself by jumping into the depths of the manlet pit, in order to appease the venerated Randy Newman, the patron saint of manletism. If his derisory offering is excepted, then the preposterously petite midget monstrosity will be blessed by having his dying wish granted, being that Short People shall be played at his nanoscopic funeral.

Sophia: Hey, why is that tarred and feathered megachurch manlet exhaustedly carrying around that cross pendant on his back over there? Isabella: It's the devastatingly dwarfed manlet's just punishment following is immediate excommunication because he got totally wasted off of one sip of communion wine and then urinated into the holy water font. Sophia: Silly manlet boys. The Passion of the Manlet. Isabella: Hahahahaha!

by ManletDepreciator August 30, 2024


manlet tossing

The highly entertaining, hilarious and trendy new sport of manlet tossing, which is surely soon to be recognized by the International Olympic Committee as an Olympic sport, consists of two or more competitors who take turns selecting a captured manlet out of the manlet pile in the adjacent manlet pit, to then effortlessly lift the pint-sized pipsqueak peewee manlet up onto their shoulders, before subsequently tossing the dwarfishly diminutive, stunted little manlet boy as far as they possibly can. If most of the onlookers refrain from urinating into the manlet pit over the course of the competition, then the kidnapped manlets will even agree to sing their favorite song Short People in veneration of their God and hero Randy Newman as they are being hurled through the air!

Manmore 1: Hey, why is that group of children standing around in that parking lot over there? Manmore 2: They seem to be engaging in the universally popular new sport of manlet tossing. Lol, that little girl just threw a subhumanly stunted squealing sissy manlet clear across the parking lot into a nearby trashcan, where he obviously belongs! Manmore 1: Gold medal! Manmore 2: Manlets BTFO.

by ManletDepreciator October 1, 2024


The Manlet

The Manlet is a hilariously brilliant trollsome poem penned by the phenomenally formidable 6-foot tall English mathematician, logician, photographer and novelist, the invigoratingly illustrious Charles Lutwidge Dodgson, better known by his notable nom de plume Lewis Carroll. True to the nature of the mental giant and valiant visionary that Lewis Carroll unquestionably was, The Manlet much later kickstarted and inspired the heavily manletism-focused online height enthusiast movement, that still remains universally beloved and enthusiastically active, by for example periodically manifesting itself via the perhaps less elegant but certainly equally eloquent manlet death threads that providentially pervade the internet to this very day. Before tragically dying of pneumonia in 1898 at the age of 65, Lewis Carroll invented a word puzzle game that he called the doublet, no doubt as a final nod to all of the magnificent manmores out there who would inevitably in the future aspire to follow in his colossal footsteps.

Manmore 1: ... and that's how the minuscule manlet boy ended up in the vacuum cleaner bag. By the way, what's your favorite song? Manmore 2: The musical masterpiece Short People by the godlike Randy Newman of course! What's your favorite poem, brah? Manmore 1: The Manlet by the preeminent Lewis Carroll, without a doubt! Manmore 2: Short people got no reason. Manmore 1: Dwarfishly-statured manlets BTFO.

by ManletDepreciator October 8, 2024


manlet mating ritual

The disgraceful yet amusing manlet mating ritual occurs when a gaggle of diminutive and desperate manlets meet up in a public place, mostly in front of basketball arenas, strip down to bikinis and high heels, oil each other up and then awkwardly gyrate to Skee-Lo's "I Wish" as they sing along in their high-pitched manletspeak, all the while internally cursing and swearing at the heavens for dooming them to a comical and dwarflike existence constantly marred by the ravages of the merited mortification universally known as manletism.

Hey, why are those cheerleaders dancing around in front of the arena over there - isn't the halftime performance usually enacted inside? Oh, it's just a manlet mating ritual - the silly manlets do it every month. Have the microscopic manlet boys ever attracted any women? Lol, of course not! Short people got no reason. Hahahahaha!

by ManletDepreciator August 22, 2024