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oracle book

When a question cannot be answered by conventional logic, one can refer to the oracle book. You do this by posing the question to a book of your choice, flipping to a random page and reading the first sentence that catches your eye. The oracle's answers may be difficult to interpret at first, but they will come to make sense as more time is allowed to pass. The oracle book is never wrong.

Genny: What are panda noises and how do they sound like?
Allie: I can't answer that logically, let's consult the oracle book.
(DAVINCI CODE: Chapter 67)
Teabing's manservant Remy, on orders from his master was doing an impressive job maneuvering the vehicle across the moonlit fields behind Chateau Villette.
*Three Hours of Deliberation*
Allie: So we're in agreement? Sounds like a box of rainbows.

by OperationsIvy March 2, 2010

4πŸ‘ 3πŸ‘Ž


Ask the Oracle

Googling the net for definitive answers.

I didn't know if it was a bad idea to mix those meds, so I decided to ask the Oracle and she told me they were the primary ingredients of vomit and comas.

by Buffycee January 14, 2011

8πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


Southern Oracle

To titty fuck two women at the same time, preferably to completion.

Alanah and Sarah knelt in front of me, pressed their boobs together and before I knew it I was performing a Southern Oracle!

by Bonesleaze March 5, 2012

2πŸ‘ 3πŸ‘Ž


War Oracle

The name of the pacifist wise man (or woman) that can be found in every city.

"Did you see that creepy old lady?" "Ya man, she was totally the LA War Oracle!"

by War Oracle October 26, 2008

1πŸ‘ 2πŸ‘Ž


The Oracle

A person among a small group who talks out of their ass almost daily about sports related topics. Usually this person will spend countless hours posting meaninglessness stats, tweets, and slap-stick Brobible links. He will then make off the wall sports predictions lacking any substance. Usually, he is ignored and wrong most of the time. Even more annoying, when be does correctly predict something, he let's the group know in the most douche chilling way possible.

"I told yall, I was right again," said the Oracle, as the group cringed in unison.

by Loonybird October 6, 2018


Oracle

A person from Ancient Greek mythology that speaks prophecies to Greek heroes AKA "Something or someone that will predict how you die :3"

Person 1: hey did you talk to the oracle today that’s in the attic.
Person 2: yeah it told me how the world could end some with farts and exploding cows
Person 1: oh that’s horrible

by Sayuki Yuko <3 August 20, 2024


Oracle

If you spell it fast enough it sounds like "oralkill", which is an expression for a cumshot with high pressure right into somebody' s mouth, which goes through the head like a bullet.

Yesterday I gave that girl an oracle and she passed out.

by Crispy Lean September 23, 2018