Using the ADD drug ritalin, or adderall to aid oneself in waking up in the morning. Usually taken an hour or so before the desired wake up time. So to be awake and cheery at 6:30a wake up groggy at 5:30a take a ritalin and pass out again. At 6:30 you wake up on your own feeling alert and rested
Friend: "Yo dude how the hell are you so awake and alert at this wee hour of the morning?"
Me: "Ritalin Alarm Clock, man. Booyah!"
58๐ 6๐
Waking someone up by ejaculating on their face.
Did you hear about the guy suing the YMCA? He was taking a nap and some dude gave him a Boston Alarm Clock.
20๐ 1๐
Drinking multiple glasses of water before going to sleep, to help ensure you wake up early due to the need to pee. (Allegedly a technique used by the Apache during the Apache Wars to wake up for pre-dawn raids.)
I got in at 3:00 AM so I set my Apache alarm clock to get up for my 8:00 class. I had to pee so bad I thought I'd put a hole through the toilet...
47๐ 5๐
The act of taking ones penis and smacking someone in the forehead until they wake up.
I told Dave I would give him a Missouri alarm clock at about 7am.
45๐ 4๐
1. Being woken up by your girlfriend as she is giving you a blow job.
I awoke with the hot, wet sensation of my girlfriends mouth on my boner. She was giving me a dutch alarm clock.
81๐ 11๐
when you wake up to someone (preferrably a woman) with your dick in their mouth performing fellatio.
wow im gonna have a great day! why? because i got a blowjob alarm clock.
459๐ 86๐
Fuck. OFF. sigh. no more fart, alcohol, potato, or poor jokes about us, please. We are people too, who have feelings, and it is offensive. We have gone through so much shit, don't know if any of you shitheads realize it, but we have. No, the blacks weren't alone. Sure they had slavery, but we had fuckin brits on us, fire us first, hire us last. We were always poor, slaved in factories, were kept down by the brits, made to build a wall, many died in the process. Little kids. Elderly, sick, tired people. Everyone gets jumped on for being racist about african-americans now, but what about all the fuckin Irish jokes? cut it out. My grandma came to America when she was 18, and everyone made her embarrassed about her heritage. She was too shy to TALK. Then, she met Grandpa. =) he understood her. Now she's pretty well off, rich actually. I have only faced a little racism, I don't really have an accent, no (well, some people say I talk a little weird, lol), but when people find out I'm Irish... there's where the alcoholic jokes begin.
" Hey, you ever give anyone an Irish Alarm Clock?"
" go die in a hole."
476๐ 105๐