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Playing Defense

When you stay sober at a party and make sure your drunk friends don't hurt themselves

Jack: Bro, I think Tim is about to puke! Someone needs to help him.

Josh: Don't worry dude, Michael is playing defense. He will help him out

by Trap Berg February 5, 2015


Defense Curl

A normal type Pokemon move used to raise it's defense.

Pokemon Trainer: Sandshrew! Use Defense Curl!

Sandshrew curls itself into a ball...

by He Who Remains Unnamed March 28, 2011


Defensive Eating

eating all the good food first so nobody else can get to it-mark

"man i hate when he does his defensive eating"

by suhhhh duude February 26, 2017

16๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


molestation defense

An updated version of the twinkie defense.

When the suspect in a criminal case uses the accusation that a close friend or relative violated them or fondled them as part of their defense, typically as a way to avoid taking responsibility for what they did. Most notably used in the Casey Anthony and Diane Downs cases, in which young mothers who killed their children accused their fathers of touching them inappropriately (even though this was irrelevant to the cases at hand and most likely completely false, as both women are pathological liars).

The intent of the molestation defense is to pander to the sympathy of jurors and media, to distract from the point of the case, and to escape taking responsibility.
Most of the time, the molestation defense is a cheap defense and a way for the suspect to excuse their crime; most victims of rape or incest do not kill, rape, steal, or commit other crimes, which should make anybody following a serious criminal case very wary about such accusations.

Casey Anthony, for one, has proven herself a sociopath by how willing that she is to accuse her father of a serious offense to save her own arse; this from the same woman who partied and whored it up in the month before her daughter was found.

by Lorelili August 3, 2011

52๐Ÿ‘ 12๐Ÿ‘Ž


Strawman defense

Sometimes referred to as the "Sovereign Citizen defense" where somebody sets defense of invalid arguments under the law and misinterpret an argument based around the United States is a corporation, spelled their name in all caps, citing rulings that have no bearing whatsoever in their court case. This type of defense is generally used anti-socials looking to avoid any form of accountability.

There's John using the strawman defense filing paperwork that he's not really "John" because they spelled his name in all caps in his discovery file and misusing court rulings from 150 years ago to claim they have no jurisdiction over him so they must let him go.

Darrell Brooks tried this type of argument which is growing im popularity amongst psychopaths and their defense.

by SchwarzenMann October 30, 2022

89๐Ÿ‘ 30๐Ÿ‘Ž


Defensive Striker

A defensive striker is the name given to a striker who is so useless at his man objective (to score goals) his fan base decide its time to literally re-write football to defend them, when in reality theyโ€™re close to bottom 5 strikers in the league

โ€œYea but heโ€™s a defensive striker so I donโ€™t care that heโ€™s not scored in 2 seasonsโ€

by XD123456789 March 31, 2020

50๐Ÿ‘ 12๐Ÿ‘Ž


defensive dining

Ordering expensive items off the menu when you know the check is going to be split evenly between everyone.

Defensive dining insures that the amount you owe at the end of the meal will be the same or less than what you ordered.

Jim: John, if you are going out with the Bill and the Marketing team for dinner tonight you need to use defensive dining when ordering. The last time I went with those guys they ordered the most expensive things on the menu and I got stuck paying $10 more than what I ordered.

by mc-sj-ca April 19, 2011

18๐Ÿ‘ 3๐Ÿ‘Ž