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A sarcastic phrase first popularised by the cult classic "Zoolander". The term itself now has many widespread social implications for its use.
The phrase is most commonly used in response to an anecdote which fails to convey any sort of interesting message. That is, the content of the anecdote is lackluster, boring or just plain irrelevant.
It is imperative to mimic the tone of Derek Zoolander when using the phrase as to give greater emphasis, it will also be more noticeable by your peer(s) as a sarcastic remark and not be misconstrued as a compliment.
Elongation of vowels is preferred but not essential, moreover Scandanavian accents or impersonations bring about best results when using this phrase.
Statement: "Whilst at work the other day I had to refill my stappler but I could only find size 4 stapples and the stappler only took size 3 which sucks. So yeah, it took me ages to find the right size stapples lying around the office."
Reponse: "Cool story Hansel"
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When a woman makes her boyfriend a sandwhich (preferably pbj or ham) and then she gives him a blowjob. After he cums on her face, he sprinkles his left over bread crumbs on her face.
Boy- Oh god, im gonna blow
Girl- yay
(boy jizzes and throws crumbs)
Boy- take my hansel and gretel slut... make me another sandwhich
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when your girl is making something in the oven, as she opens the oven door you shove her head in and fuck her in the ass
rick gave his grandma the old hansel and gretel as she took the thanksgiving turkey out of the ove
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Originally inspired by the movie Zoolander, this sarcastic phrase is used to respond to a story that lacks substance, or a story perceived to have no message.
The only way to redeem one's self after having been on the receiving end of this remark is to sarcastically reply "Thanks Olaf"
"... and it turns out that after I talked to her, she didn't actually know my friend."
"Cool Story Hansel!"
"Thanks, Olaf!"
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when your women is making something in the oven, as she opens the oven door you run up behind her shove her head in then you pants her and fuck her in either hole
brandon used the hansel and gretel on his mother in law
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To have sex with someone inside an oven. Requires extreme flexibility and a high resistance to heat. (Or just very big appliances).
From the children's fairy tale "Hansel and Gretel". Because we know what they were REALLY doing in that oven...
A. She wanted to hansel-and-gretel him, but unfortunately, she wasn't flexible and he just couldn't take the heat.
B. "Are things getting hot in here, or is that just me?"
"No, stupid, it's just because we're hansel-and-greteling."
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To be big headed, literally.
To have a big head.
That guy has one hanselness head.