Homemade Roofies

n. any type of blunt object that can knock a person unconscious and can be found around the house

v. (Homemade Roofie, Homemade Roofie-ing, Homemade Roofied) the act of using any blunt object to knock a person unconscious

"I am finally having Sally over tonight. If things don't go according to plan, this frying pan or two by four will make for a couple of good Homemade Roofies."

Sally to friend: "And when I told him I didn't want to sleep with him he tried to Homemade Roofie me."

9👍 18👎

homemade bidet

When you do a poo which is so perfectly formed that a little bit of water splashes you right in the poo hole.

Oli:Yo dawg, that poo was so good I got a homemade bidet
Mike: Pom Pom Pom

1👍 1👎

Homemade Pie

Masturbation, jerking off, or taming your dragon at your home. Hence the "homemade" part.

Jimbo-Hey Joe wanna go to the party tonight at Silly Billy's place?
Joe- ahh..no thanks I'm gonna make some homemade pie.
Jimbo- whats that
Joe- My mom just got the magazine Good Housekeeping. So im gonna jerk off to that.

1👍 1👎

homemade oreo

when your partner shits on your chest then jizzes on the shit then shits on top off the jizz covered shit making an oreo then you eat it

Blessings love Casper's homemade oreos. They could eat a million of them every day!

7👍 24👎

homemade smokes

It is where you get all the old Butts with bits of tabbaco in them, then you put it all together and get a piece of paper and role it up and fucken smoke it and its fucken crazy shash.

Tommo:lets make a homemade smoke
Aaron:Aight
Tommo:(makes it)......PUFFFFFFFFFF.......hmmmmmmm crazy shash.

5👍 17👎

homemade lasagne

Violent bum rape, optionally with a strap on.

She invited me round for tea, but it turns out she had HOMEMADE LASAGNE in mind!

4👍 15👎

Homemade Russian salad

When mates are having a proper feast, and drinking lots of red wine. They’re enjoying themselves and having a brainy time.
After a while one of the dudes suddenly disappears out to take a puke. He’s delivering the deal, and when the job is done, he looks through the tears in his eyes, and realizes that the substance, which he just gave to the ground, looks totally similar to Russian salad.
He storms in to tell the other mates what a madlad he indeed is.

Dudes: “PETE! Where have you goddamn been?! All of a sudden you just disappeared.”

Pete: “Sike, just gave the ground my homemade russian salad”

Dudes: “Ahh fair man”