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housewife spliffin

A phrase refering to lesbian sex

My girlfriend and I just did a little housewife spliffin

by Unicirn queen November 15, 2017

18πŸ‘ 6πŸ‘Ž


housewife cocktail

Xanax and Red Wine

Got a bottle of josh cab and a couple beans. Me and the boys gonna rip some housewife cocktails tonight

by Goldman, ron November 24, 2020


Desperate Housewife

A shot; when you empty a bottle of pills into a glass of whiskey and just down it, and then you lie down somewhere and wonder what will happen to you.

On the Whiskey Tour, we got so drunk we almost let Mike take a Desperate Housewife, but then told him not to.

by Formina Sage July 24, 2010

16πŸ‘ 8πŸ‘Ž


feral housewife

So if a domestic housewife is the proper stay at home mom type, cooks, cleans, watches the kids kind of wife

Then that would make the feral housewife the slutty bratty wife, doesn’t have kids and they party and have crazy mind blowing sex all the time.

A: Man, screw getting a domestic housewife, I want me a feral housewife.

B: A what?

A: You know? A girl that can hold her own. Talks back. And can fuck like an animal.

by RibCage98 October 20, 2020

73πŸ‘ 53πŸ‘Ž


Hoochie Housewife

When you have a wife that has one foot in the relationship and one foot out of the relationship. (Wifeish)

Your wife is talking to other guys, shes nothing but a Hoochie Housewife!

by Tythehealthyguy December 8, 2018


housewife weight

The excessive baggage that is gradually acquired over time by a housewife. They start off pretty, but slowly turn into fat cows who do nothing all day but sit around and eat things covered in chocolate and creamy shit.

Housewife weight results from a belief that, since the woman already has a husband who will pay for all the stupid, pointless shit she wants, she has a right to stop exercising and eating right, because she thinks that he will not leave her. If the man is smart, he will drop her tubby ass like a bad habit and find a girl half his age.

Once upon a time, John married a hot young intelligent woman named Jane. Jane began gaining housewife weight, and slowly morphed from a 9 into a -2, and became indestinguishable from a common farm hog.

by Daniel Jakubek November 30, 2006

24πŸ‘ 16πŸ‘Ž


Canadian Housewife

A stay at home mom who can't cook, clean nor supervise her 5+ children. Her husband eventually gives up and walks, but not without paying her child support. She makes new friends who in turn take advantage of her and her money. She and her girlfriends smoke like a coal plant. She eats take-out or orders delivery. The entire house is a disgusting mess. There are cigarette burns in the carpet, many many old food containers, old moldy dirty dishes piling in the sink, stains on the wall and the smell of stale nicotine permeates the air. The kids are unwashed. Their clothing are hand-me-downs of various out-dated styles. She's on anti-depressants and whole other cocktail of meds. She writes many letters to Oprah asking for help and money, which all go unanswered.

Building Inspector: What the fuck happened to this house!!!!!??? It's such a pig sty.

Landlord: Canadian Housewife.

Building Inspector: BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!

Landlord: Thanks a lot now I'll have to clean that up too.

by Nonchalant Ego March 25, 2010

46πŸ‘ 36πŸ‘Ž