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Evil multi-billion dollar corporations that earn a profit from your premiums, and then find any loophole they can so they can refuse to live up to their responsibility in order to save money.
An insurance company is really a legal form of fraud.
89👍 25👎
The things a man does to keep his woman satisfied, so she won't be tempted by another man or just leave him flat-out. Included but not limited to her emotional, sexual, and financial desires.
"I brought home flowers and candy for my lady last night, then took her out to dinner. It's all part of the premium I pay for my wife insurance."
Masturbating prior to having penetrative sex in the hope that this will prevent the male from experiencing premature ejaculation.
Howay, man. I hope you're not gonna shoot your load too quickly.
Dinnae worry, pet. I had an insurance wank in the toilet at Pizza Hut just before we left. Now get a load of this...
First using a glitch to clone your pokemon/items,
and then trading the clones to another game cartridge... just in case
the internal battery should ever run dry, or the game breaks.. etc.
Could also be referred to as making a backup cartridge.
OH NO!!!! My saved game has disappeared... good thing I have pokemon insurance! 8D
17👍 3👎
An agreement reached between at least 2 people meaning that in the case one of them fails to get lucky, the other one will provide them with the desired service (usually intercourse).
Having someone ready to fall back on should one not be able to get laid. This can be a friend, a f*** buddy, a partner in an open relationship, a sex acquaintance, etc. Problems often arise when 2 people both have sex insurance with each other, and only one gets laid, or one takes out too many sex insurance policies ie. sex insurance with too many people.
1 - Amanda had a hot date last night, but the loser said that he "had to be up early" the next morning and left her without any action. Luckily Amanda had agreed with her friend Steve that they would provide sex insurance to each other, and since Amanda was in the mood, she called Steve up when her date left and they slept together.
2 - Mike and Ted happened to not pick up any chicks at the bar last Saturday. Luckily for Mike his sex insurance partner also had no luck that night and he called her on the way home to hook up with her.
33👍 8👎
The chocolate factory (as in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) of the law profession, where desperate attorneys work for a pittance, like Oompa Loompas working for cacao beans. Except in Insurance Defense, the attorneys don't smile and sing happy songs.
I went to a ttt, and now I do insurance defense. In a sad and cruel twist of fate, I can't even afford the insurance rates of my own clients, so my teeth are rotting away, and the pinched nerve in my groin is making me incontinent.
156👍 56👎
When your pretty sure it's just a fart, but you're gonna push that thing out with some force, so you sit down on the toilet just in case some poop's gonna follow
Guy 1: Hold on, i need to change my pants
Guy 2: Why?
Guy 1: I decided to go without poop insurance and ended up shitting my pants
9👍 1👎