Random
Source Code

Flatwater Kayak

A suicidal sport based on racing tippy boats down flat water including, but not limited to, lakes and gorges. Most sprint athletes train through the winter without all that much clothing, layering what they do wear oddly in haste or desperation for warmth. Sprint kayakers are often considered to be rowers' slow cousin and whitewaters' wimpy sister, but in reality alot of pain and guts goes into the sport.

Most clubs share training grounds with rowers and have develloped an intense rivalry with them. Sprint kayakers have to remain fit not just for overall speed but also to fit in the thin boats. New kayakers frequently capsize, and to avoid this they might stear clear of using seats, which brings them lower to the water's surface and improves balance. Many boats use tall spikes to hold seats in place, and as many clubs are fairly poor many boats lack footboards (a board that kayakers use with steering and legdrive) so athletes occasionally have to deal with extreme discomfort. The sport is embaressing if you're caught in public in winter gear, or if you capsize during a regatta on a popular lake. This sport is not to be confused with recreational kayaking; recreational kayaks do well on rough waters while sprint boats are brutal in the wind.

1)
Brad: "Hey, Keith, check out that freaky chick with the layered spandex!"
Keith: "Haha, I hear she kayaks or something, who does that in the winter, she must be crazy!"
2)
Leslie: "Hey, kayaker! Having trouble keeping up with us shells?" (shells referring to rowing boats)
Andrea: "Hey, rower! Having trouble identifying that whale you're heading straight towards?"
3)
Oscar: "Yo, sprint is whitewater's gimped sis, man!"
Tory: "Oh yeah, I forgot that it's wimpy to risk hypothermia 6 months of the year while pulling 200 pounds with my arms and abs."
4)
Gregory: "God, it's sooooo cold out, and I have to walk home from the bus!"
Calvin: "Yeah, I have to go kayak until 7:00."
Gregory: "Serious, man? Are you crazy?"
Calvin: "Nah, just a wee bit suicidal."

FLATWATER KAYAK OWNS

by lolCKClol November 21, 2009


kayaking buddy

A gay sex partner met discreetly via the internet.

"I'm just finishing up with my kayaking buddy, I met him through America Online"

by joedanger June 23, 2015

23πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


kayak yak

any talk related to the sport of kayaking

We went for coffee and kayak yak.

by Loudee August 21, 2006

19πŸ‘ 2πŸ‘Ž


roller-kayaking

The act of strapping a skateboard to a trash can or recycling bin, by means of a cord or duct tape, and riding in the bin down a hill at rigorous speeds. During rolling kayaking, it is crucial to have a long stick(such as a hockey stick) to paddle with, similar to what a rower does. Depending on the terrain, extra padding may be required, such as a seat when tearing it up on the hardcore ramps. For experienced roller kayakers, try iced-down surfaces for extreme thrills.

Hey dude, we just had a major ice storm and the hills are shitty for sledding, why don't we go roller-kayaking?

by Nick C. W. April 22, 2008

41πŸ‘ 8πŸ‘Ž


kayak drunk

The art of drinking such a perfect amount of alcohol that one does not black out, throw up, or die. However, there is one constant when being KAYAK drunk which is the fact that said individual will end up throwing a kayak at another living human.

Friend #1:β€œDude, how did you chip your tooth?”

Friend #2: β€œI spent a week at my buddy’s lake house and we got kayak drunk. The thing hit me right in the face.”

by Adele is fat September 19, 2019


Mexican Kayak

Sexual term. It's when a man with a mustache lays on his back in a bathtub of water while his female partner sits on him to have intercourse. What makes this so special is all the while, she is holding a ping pong paddle in each hand and slapping the water in a swimming motion.

see definition of Mexican Kayak

by Wordsarefunny June 19, 2009

9πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


jazzy kayak

When a guy lays strait on his back and a girl is on top singing jazz music while fake rowing

β€œYo last night was so crazy, Jess gave me a jazzy kayak”

by Harry669styles September 24, 2022