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When one is notified of an unread E-Mail but in actual fact, they have not recieved one at all.
Guy 1: Oh cool, one new message and... it's a ghost e-mail.
The waiting period after you send an e-mail that is somewhat nasty or contains a dirty joke to a person that you are still trying to feel out their limits of what they consider acceptable and what is not.
Charlie suffered 48 hours of e-mail remorse until Linda finally replied to his e-mail in a positive way and followed it up with her own dirty joke.
Emotional Cat Mail - A cat using blackmail to its advantage
A joke errand given to new sailors. Consists of sending a sailor to the weather decks with a hook, a lamp, and a harness to look for an air-dropped buoy carrying the ship's mail.
Clarence was given mail buoy watch. He had no idea there was no such thing.
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The phrase I hear every time I check my aol email that makes me want to punch a wall.
"YOU GOT MAIL"
"omg wtf stfu" *punches wall*
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Knowing my thoughts and views without being told.
So, do you want to do a three-way?
You've been reading my mail, honey.
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A disease workers obtain (usually ones confined in cubicles) when they are over-eager to recieve an important e-mail. This is common among computer engineers, programmers, and bosses who do nothing.
NOTE: the e-mail monkey is a disease, but is very literal because a monkey will climb on top of your back
(WARNING) It will press the e-mail key with its foot
The only way to cure e-mail monkey is to deactivate your interneuter yourself and go cold turkey (which literally climbs on your back)
(from Dilbert : WHEN DID IGNORANCE BECOME A POINT OF VIEW? by Scott Adams)
Asok: I have an e-mail monkey on my back, but I can quit whenever I want
Asok: I don't need to check it every minute. I can resist!
Asok: But Look! the stupid monkey hit my keyboard with his foot
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