Arken's Law

Very similiar to Godwin's law. The difference being that, while Godwin's law dictates that a thread on a forum or Usenet is finished when Hitler or the Nazi's are invoked, Arken's law says that a discussion is over when present society is compared to Orwell's Oceania in the book 1984.

Poster 1: America is just like 1984...remember, Big Brother is Watching

Poster 2: By Arken's law, this discussion is over and you are a moron.

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mother-in-law

A woman who bears children who one day wed, will find herself at the wedding day changed into a mother-in-law. This demotion of status as the previous Number One female in her children's world can create horrible changes in what was once a lovely woman. Most of the bad scenarios arise from a jealousy between wives and mother-in-laws, although there have been some husbands who have faced the wrath of a mother-in-law. A mother-in-law is generally seen as a mythically bad person. As a parallel, father-in-laws don't get the same bad rap.

New wife says, "I thought I married just my husband, but his mother is a huge part of our life!"

Therapist says, "Yes, she is your mother-in-law, and if you let her, she can destroy your marriage. Think - two women love the same man."

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Sister-In-Law

1. Your Husband's, Brother's Wife

2. The annoying bitch who thinks she has been in the family longer, so she can command the family to do what she wants.

3. The Family Manipulator

4. The Bitch that won't be at my wedding.

*Your* sister-in-law will NOT be at our wedding, because that bitch does not know how to shut her mouth.

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Osama's Law

It doesnt matter what it is, if you post it on the internet ( Specifically IFunny ) people will find something to complain about. it could be something as small as a single letter spelling mistake or something as mundane as a layer of dust. people will always point out anything to make themselves feel superior.

Hey Dude, did you see that featured about the dudes collection of Black ops Prestige edition memorabilia? Yeah, Totally Osama's Law Bait. you see all the comments telling the dude to dust his shelf?

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toilet law

shanty law firms where the yearly salary is less than the yearly bonus enjoyed by biglaw associates. often not offering health insurance or meaningful experience, toilet law firms have high turnover and low morale.

jdjive had a great blacklist of toilet law firms in manhattan, but the partners of some of the named toilet law firms thugged themselves out and threatened to break some kneecaps. of course, they could have opted to file a lawsuit, but since they are toilet law, anyone could have caught their bluff, because they would have lost if they tried. going tony soprano was simpler.

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Moff's Law

1) As a discussion of a creative work grows longer, the probability of some ass whining about “overanalyzing” approaches 1.

2) In any discussion of creative work, anyone who says “OMG, why can’t you just enjoooy it??” automatically loses. Hard.

(as defined by karinova)

After he whined "why can't you just enjoy Avatar without bringing RACE or IMPERIALISM into it?!!?" (because he was losing the argument), we invoked Moff's Law all over his ass.

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Otalps' Law

Every argument on the internet is fundamentally a debate over definitions

Person A: Video games are art
Person B: No they are not
...
...
...
...
Person A: What even is "Art"?
Person B: Sigh. Otalps' law

Bill: Venezuela is socialist

Adam: No
Bill: Yes
Otalp: This is Otalps' law

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