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The kind of parents where if you get 19/20 they would spank your ass so hard you would spill blood. So if the kid get 0/20, there would literally be mass murder from the parents.
Jeff: (oh hell no, help me jesus) Uhm... I got 0/20...
Asian parents: It's okay sweetheart, we're just gonna prepare the nuke and all of our guns. And use it, on you.
God: okay that's enough bullshit I'm taking the child
5👍 2👎
When your friends update status always have something to do with the kids being out of control, they are secretly asking for advice on how to handle the situation.
Tim: did you see Kim's facebook status all day yesterday?
Todd: Yeah, she is always talking about her bad kids.
Tim: That is what you call Facebook Parenting. She doesn't know how to control the kids.
5👍 2👎
A member of society that has obviously become a parent because of their complete inept at the use of birth control or outright stupidity. In every single case of teenage parenting, abortion is the correct solution, no matter what the psychological impact, religious or parental influence may be. Even in cases of rape, the teen parent is a complete and total retard, even if it was against his or her will. Any person who has elected to give birth and attempt to raise a child as a teenager is an idiot for their inept or for their bad luck.
Even when the teenager grows older, he or she will never possess maturity and will never realize that what happened was a bad decision (because every pregnancy was carefully calculated). Whereas mature, adult parents often claim that their child is "the best thing that ever happened to them," no teenage parent feels this way because their children are and will always be a burden with no tangible rewards (as tangible rewards are the only things teens may comprehend). Any person who was or is a teen parent that views their child as anything other than a burden is an idiot for thinking that.
It is the accepted norm of each village to throw small rocks or sizable chunks of lead at each teenage parent on sight. This action promotes the general feeling that all teenage parents are idiots, no matter how responsible they were after their initially mistake or rotten luck.
In conclusion, all babies born of teen parents should be sent to the people of Ireland for feeding. The parents of said babies should all be taken to the local Town Hall and publically executed, broadcast on FOX. Perhaps Simon from American Idol will show up with his "brilliant" generic cynicism to let the would-be teen parents know that they are and forever will be, fucking idiots.
Child 1: Did you hear about Joanne? She's going to become a teen parent!
Child 2: That slut cannot keep her legs closed, and that Bill should have worn a condom! God, they are so stupid!
Child 1: I know...well, I mean she was on the Pill and the condom broke, but they should have been prepared for that shit, the idiots!
Child 2: They were both accepted to Ivy League schools, too...I guess their dreams of ever making large sums of money just went out the window. Serves them right, fucking idiots.
Adult 1: Did you hear, Bob's son, Bill got Jill's daughter, Joanne pregnant? They had an abortion because of the financial stress it would have put on them.
Adult 2: Really? I never had sex before marriage because it's against my religion. I condemn them because abortion is also against my religion. They are bad people.
Adult 1: Maybe if the children had access to condoms, they could have prevented the pregnancy in the first place. Unfortunately, two years ago your right-wing conservative groups banned the sale of condoms to minors.
Adult 2: Perhaps if they had followed the cirriculum of abstinence only, it wouldn't have happened either.
198👍 218👎
The parents decision to not circumcise their child even though the father is clipped. The decision is made because others have convinced the parents this is a brutal barbaric act. Now the parents have to teach the child how to pull the foreskin back and clean the smegma out of there. Their never going to teach him that.
Because of his parental uncircumcision decision little billy's sea cucumber has a nasty disgusting smell caused by all that smegma that's been sitting there for days.
15👍 12👎
of american origin, used also within england(uk)and wales(uk). This term denotes the implyed genetic keepers who may also support their dependants and overbearingly control and impead the living of their offspring.
Be careful, the "parental units" are about the home.
38👍 35👎
Parents who make their families seem perfect only social media but in real life they could be really bad parents.
Friend 1: How was New York?
Friend 2: It was the worst week of my life!
Friend 1: Really? Your mom posted a pic with the caption " Best trip ever!"
Friend 2: Well two seconds after the photo was taken my parent got in a fight about what was for lunch. My mom likes to pretend we have a perfect family on facebook.
Friend 1: Well that's shallow.
Friend 2: Yea. They are Facebook Parents
8👍 3👎
A short phrase for when a girl wraps her legs around you during sex to prevent you from pulling out.
Dude! Ashley totally tried to Parent Trap me last night!
9👍 8👎