reality shifting

a trend mentally ill teenagers took action in . they say they can move their subconscious or consciousness across the multiverse (lets not forget the universe is absolutely huge , over billions of light years huge and thats just OUR ONE universe alone) .. in reality this is just plain delusion and i will never understand how someone can believe that lol. they also refer to CIA documents and quantum jumping which have nothing to do with their version of “reality shifting” and doesnt prove any of what theyre saying to be real . (most havent even read the CIA documents) anyways , i suggest please stop doing this because it can damage you mentally and this is not a safe way to cope ..

friend : “bro have u heard about reality shifting??”
me : “yes .. do u believe what they say ?”
friend : “nah bro its a whole bunch of unrealistic bs”
me : “ikrr thats what i be telling them but they dont seem to understand..”
friend : “they need therapy .. they're js damaging their mental health even more by trying to escape this reality.”

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vocational paradigm shift

Job loss / being fired.

(as made famous by How I Met Your Mother, on CBS)

--

Ted: "Well, after he proposed a vocational paradigm shift, I made an impromptu presentation using a four-pronged approach that really brought him to his knees."

Barney: "You hit him with a chair?"

Ted: "Yep."

shift

1: to hide a corpse
2: to steal items that do not belong to you
3: upgrade your status from small to big

1: i'm an uppercase rapper, cos i shift my enemies
2: dat shop got shifted
3: i've metta-shifted from from the shit list to the hit list

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control shift n

Control Shif N: Masturbation

Back story: In google chrome this is the short cut for incognito mode, a mode that doesn't track history. it can be used to hide porn in your browsing history.

person 1:wow Caleb has been gone a while
person 2: he might be control shift n ing

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ctrl-shift-esc

Ctrl+Shift+Esc is an alternative key command to Ctrl+Alt+Del, for systems with Windows Vista or higher/newer installed. It may also be available in older versions of Windows, depending on system configurations (i.e. multiple user accounts are registered to the system/computer). Pressing Ctrl+Alt+Del will typically bring up the Windows Security screen. From there the Task Manager is accessible, among other options (log off, change password, shut down, etc.). In contrast, pressing Ctrl+Shift+Esc will launch the Task Manager directly, skipping the step of navigating the Windows Security screen. Both are equally effective. It is up to the individual user to determine which is most convenient.

In campus library:

Student: "WTF! My laptop froze AGAIN!! I'm never gonna get this assignment done..." -reaches to hold power button down-

Student's friend: "Whoa, wait a sec! Try hitting control, shift, escape. It might be not be Office that's crashing. Save yourself some hassle."

Person across table: -looks over at the two, confused- "Don't you mean control, alt, delete?"

Student's friend: "Same idea, but this is a little quicker."

Person across table: "Oh. I hadn't heard of that. Never mind, then." -shrugs and returns to reading-

Student's friend: -presses ctrl-shift-esc, then navigates Task Manager to look for unresponsive program(s) to close- "See, it was the media player you had going. You would've lost a whole page if you just shut it off like that."

Student: "That's awesome! Thank you!"

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ctrl+shift+w

A keyboard shortcut built into the Google Chrome browser (and some others) which, when invoked, closes all tabs in the focused window. Used to instantly erase visual evidence of objectionable activity.

I was browsing the Web for adult material when my mother walked into my room. Luckily I used ctrl+shift+w to close the incognito window I was using and she didn't suspect a thing.

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C-Shift Slam

When FireFighters on C-Shift get an unremarkable amount of calls and neglect station duties, wake up late, put equipment out of service that was functioning properly, and complain that the other shifts do not get anything accomplished. But in reality only 3 calls were ran and one call was on the 2nd day of the 48 hour shift.

Shift A,B: how was your guys tour?

Shift C: We got slammed.

Shift A,B: How many calls did you get?

Shift C: We got slammed capt, we got slammed, we ran 3 calls, we got slammed

Shift A to shift B: That's a C-Shift Slam, running no calls and complaining that got slammed with a mad amount of calls