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When you've been spanking the monkey for an hour or more, doing your hand mantra and exceptional kamasutra to almost, almost, almost.. ..and then finally release a load so great it's almost comparable to sex - this is what we call an epic wank.
-I just had the most epic wank last night, to some epic xxx.
-The moment of which my tremendous load shot through the canal of my penis and shot out after the two hours of holding it in can only be described as absolute bliss, nothing like taking a piss.
-*shooting out the biggest load*. Wow. What an epic wank.
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2. The Art of being able to masturbate oneself to the point of orgasm but stop short of ejaculation.
oh bother I can't find any tissues never mind I'll treat myself to a Dry Wank
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The act of messaging back and forth between two people, sending pictures of five people the other finds attractive while masturbating, until somebody ejaculates, winning the wank battle.
Dude, Kyle and I were wank battling last night for hours, and just when I thought it would be a draw he sent a picture of Jenna Jameson and I finished and won the wank battle.
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the art of wanking quietly and discretely in public or in an area of high visablity, or simply the art of wanking like a ninja.
A secretive faction of monks from long and far have mastered this form of masturbation whilst going out there daily rituals.
It is said to bring inner peace and balance to ones self, but costs a fortune in laundry bills.
only the masterful eye can see someone having a ninja wank, but if someone does this would be the reaction...
man 1- 'Dude wtf is that man doing in his pocket?'
man 2- 'Must be having a ninja wank'
man 1- 'Holy shit i thought that was just in fairytales'
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The same as Fight Club but you know for wanking instead.
The Rules Are.
1st RULE: You do not talk about WANK CLUB.
2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about WANK CLUB.
3rd RULE: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the wank is over.
4th RULE: Only two guys to a wank.
5th RULE: One wank at a time.
6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.
7th RULE: Wanks will go on as long as they have to.
8th RULE: If this is your first night at WANK CLUB, you HAVE to wank.
To do so would be a breach of rules 1 & 2 of Wank Club.
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To falsely confess to downloading pornographic material to get the real culprit out of trouble.
Oh shit, I forgot to wipe my porn from my girlfriend's laptop!
Don't worry, I'll tell her it was me, I'll take a wank bullet for you buddy!
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the act of jangling change held in a suit trouser pocket, usually performed by male office workers whilst stood chatting to colleagues
to stand near someone, chatting to them, but simultaneously coin wanking by caressing and fondling the change in your pocket
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