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(v.) This is a act of a male pouring maple syrup in the Mr. america's shield on the set of the insanely popular show "The Colbert Report" , then another male defecating in the shield and pouring it on a large moose head letting it run off into Stanly's cup. Then forcing the concoction into any orifice of a midget. The hard part is getting it all in though.
Did you read about Canada's History in that one magazine Canada's history? No? check The Beaver
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An obscure sexual act between distance lovers, so named after the lengthy and distant span of Canada's history. Two people using computer technology, or phones if you must, lie nude in a self-dug ditch, preferably in the woods, that has been well-urinated in. The technology is to maintain audio and/or video communication between the two lovers. While discussing the mating habits of woodland creatures, the couple masturbates furiously until achieving orgasm, at which moment they are to leap out of the hole and climb the nearest tree to its top. While the adrenaline is still fresh and powerful (like the urine) from the act, the lovers take a deep, slow breath from atop the tree. This links the post-coitus mates together through the power of nature, which smells and tastes like Canada's History.
When Johnny and Sally were apart, attending college in different states, they maintained their amorous attitudes toward each other by sharing Canada's History once or twice a week.
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The act of utilizing a pair of moose antlers as gynecological stirrups while pouring maple syrup out of the Stanley cup onto your partner. Spanking with Canadian bacon is optional.
Look out baby. tonight I'm going to school you in Canada's History
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the act of penetrating the ear of a wild boar with an erect penis covered in the hot sauce known as sriracha
I enjoyed Canada's History while I was camping on the weekend
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Canada's History is a sexual act in which both the male and female take a large shit on the corner of their bed. They then go to sleep and never bother to clean it up every again symbolizing that Canada's history is basically a bunch of shit no one even cares enough about to clean up.
Jim, "So me and Lisa performed a Canada's History last night, turns out its not hot or romantic at all"
Mark, "no shit" (pun intended)
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A furry, buck-toothed rag you could wring for eternity and never squelch a drop of blood or semen. Formerly called "The Beaver." Flag modelled after the quintessential Canadian still life, "Politely Railing a Virgin From a Safe Distance!" See also, The Juices of My Labour.
When you throw Canada's History against the wall, you're lucky if you get hit with a lawsuit!
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A vile and depraved sex act for those with whom gerbilling was simply not enough. A gerbil is inserted into the anus for sexual stimulation, then, once removed, it is used to gag a partner's mouth, who is then (usually) double-penetrated.
"Did you hear Cindy's going to be the party?"
"Yeah, but I wouldn't touch that with a ten-foot pole, I heard she did Canada's History with some random dude last week."
"I am horrified."
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"Did you hear about that magazine The Beaver?"
"What about it?"
"It's changing its name to 'Canada's History' because they thought it's name would no longer be censored for pornography!"
"Boy is that ironic!"
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