uncle ted

the real definition of an "uncle ted" is someone who walks into an empty restroom full of empty stalls, other than the one you are in, and opts to drop a major duece in the stall right next to you, which in turn annoys the fuck out of you just like your uncle ted does. Not recommended as uncle tedding someone can get your shoes pissed on.

"dude, im pissed as fuck."
"why what happened?"
"I was enjoying my peaceful morning shat session when some asshole decided to uncle ted me."
"what did you do?"
"I pissed on his shoes."
"good, he deserved it. Some people!"

168👍 92👎

Uncle Crimbo

Uncle Crimbo is the Santa Claus-type figure of the Kingdom of Loathing.

Even though he doesn't have any children, nor any brothers or sisters, he's still an uncle. Purely by the magic of Crimbo.

Unfortunately, Uncle Crimbo has recently had some drinking problems, and his disgruntled little elves are tired of being exploited and forced to work in the Factory sweatshop wherein all Crimbo toys are made.

Uncle Crimbo stopped by my campground and left this groovy Advent Calendar. Boss.

or

Oh sweet Jick, Uncle Crimbo can make Teddy Bears now!

11👍 4👎

Uncle Happy

The unofficial Pendako uncle. He is friendly, big, hairy, hands out beatings, loves you, is behind you, and he also is known for being unique.

"Uncle Happy just smacked that gobber up nicely with his left leg."

11👍 3👎

uncle daddy

What no traveling salesman wants to hear from his kids. Mother tells the kids every overnight male gueat is their uncle. A man on the road a lot becomes another face to small kids.

I've been on the road so much, my kids call me "Uncle Daddy" now.

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Uncle Fester

An unflushed dump left in the toilet.

Jimmy left an uncle fester in the mens room.

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Uncle Vic

Slang term used by Vicodin addicts to describe, you guessed it, Vicodin.

Hey, man, you got some Uncle Vic for me?

13👍 4👎

Everyone and their uncle

Old saying inferring that a shitload of people are doing something or are somewhere.

1. Everyone and their uncle is saying pwned nowadays. n00bs!
2. Everyone and their uncle was high in the 60's.
3. Everyone and their uncle is defending that 'titan'! (BF2142)

13👍 4👎