Random
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Random
When a man has the sudden urge to get as far away from someone as possible, while also desperately wanting to fuck them.
We were just getting hot and heavy when she pulled a knife out of the nightstand and started spanking herself with the side of it. Total terror boner.
When your significant other becomes horny at the thought of you, and the thought of them being horny at the thought of you makes you horny in turn.
Girl: Oh babe, your back muscles are sooo defined and it's turning me on.
Guy: -moan- (now erect, as counter-boner)
When you black out and wake up in a bush the next day with morning wood. In the ideal situation, your penis should be the only thing sticking out of the bush.
"Damn bro we were so fucked up last night, I woke up with a Bush Boner. Good thing the landscapers didn't chop my dick off!"
when your tampon or pad is soaked and you don't have any extras so you stuff your underwear with tissues and it looks like a boner
oh shit I just realized I made myself a period boner
When a male gets an erection from out of nothing. It just randomly gets hard. There is no hot girl or anything else that can cause a boner.
Dude, I was sitting in chemistry when out of nowhere I got a dry boner.
An erection caused by the vibrations of an automobile, bumpy roads or the like. Usually not desired*
"Get out of the car already man!"
"I can't, I'm pitchin a tent...buzz boner man, that road was bumpy."
When you're absolutely wasted and can't get your dick up, but you need to fuck a chick. You pray to Jesus for a solid erection and he comes through like a bro.
Q: Hey, what are you doing in church?
A: I was smashed the other night but needed to fuck this chick, so I prayed and God tossed me the greatest Jesus Boner I've ever had. Now I feel obligated to go to church.