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end table

A great sinister trick to pull on that special someone. First, position her on all fours in the middle of a large room or any other open area in her house. Proceed to bang away for a little bit so she doesn't get wise to your game. Then, when the time is right, you carefully reach back and grab that perfectly hidden can of open paint you stashed beforehand. Place it directly on the center of her back and pull out. Finish her off by jerking one off in her eye and sit back and watch her squirm as she tries to figure out how the hell to get up with out spilling the can of paint. Put on your clothes and proudly go home knowing you may have failed shop class in high school, but tonight you made the perfect end table.

The above is the example

by MC Menses December 3, 2004

17๐Ÿ‘ 19๐Ÿ‘Ž


Table Knock

A-To give notice to another person by knocking with the knuckles upon a table top when frustrated with said person.

B-To mark one's territory when concerning a loved one, like a dog pissing on its front lawn.

C-To make one's presence felt.

I was at the bar with Ronelle and she started talking to these three guys at a table. So, as I walked past, I table knocked those mother fuckers. They all looked at me with so much fear and confusion in their eyes. Mainly confusion.

by Virginia Mission October 16, 2009

8๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž


Flip a table

1 - When overcome with anger or frustration you stand up and all the people at your table stand up together. You feel the impending sense that your friends will have your back at whatever is going down. Your rage boils over, you verbally assault the offender, and with no further options-you flip the table in front of you.

2 - In the absence of an actual table, the phrase can be used metaphorically.

1 - ....are you mackin' on my girl?!?! *everyone stands up* 'Foo you better get back.....*flip a table*

2 - This is well vodka....who does this bartender thinks he is? I'm bouts to flip a table!

by LeeRemick December 6, 2011

11๐Ÿ‘ 11๐Ÿ‘Ž


Table Goblin

A mysterious bipedal creature known to inhabit BBQ restaurants in northern Florida. The creature is approximately 5'6" weighing around 115 pounds. It's table cleaning skills are surpassed by no known human being and it has an uncanny ability to clean debris beneath tables without the use of a broom. Another observed ability of the table goblin is its ability to squeeze into closets and unjam doors. The table goblin has been observed at several parties in the 850, often sippin' on red label Smirnoff or carrying around a bottle of Josรฉ Cuervo. If you encounter this creature, take special care to keep your woman close by. The table goblin posses irresistible charm and just might take your girl back to his lair to lend her some goblin sauce.

Known Haunts: Goodman's BBQ of Perry, FL

Holy shit! I've never had a table cleaned off so fast in my life!

or

Did you see that?! That table goblin just squeezed through a 4 inch gap to get into the closet!

or

That damn table goblin just rode off with my girl!

by Lil' Coconut August 14, 2008

5๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


under the table

An open but confusing sexual orientation.

If you were to walk into a room in which one person was in the closet and another were under the table, you would probably notice (and be confused by) the the person under the table, while you would probably not notice the person in the closet. The person under the table is not hiding, but nor does the person conform to standard categories (gay, straight, bi) or expectations of behavior. Communication about why a person is under the table is often hampered because explanations are complicated, easily misunderstood, disregarded as self-delusion, or even because the person under the table does not fully understand.

Q: Is Pat gay, straight, or bi?
A: None of the above, he's under the table.

by Under the Table September 25, 2008

35๐Ÿ‘ 51๐Ÿ‘Ž


Table-ussy

A whole in a table with soap in a hole making a Table-ussy

bro in my class there is a "table-ussy"

by OWENWWWWWWWW September 1, 2022


table-legged

The act of attempting to level a wobbly table that has one leg shorter than the others. Usually resulting in reducing a dinner table to the height of a coffee table.

I just table-legged my haircut, (by trying to even out the ends).

by JD Too February 18, 2013