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Baron Von Steuben

He was like, this super badass immigrant gay himbo in the American Revolution and a bunch of crappy places are named after him. Okay so Germany kicked him out for being gay, Ben Franklin sent him and his boyfriend here, He did a bunch of awesome stuff, gave us some Prussian drilling, made us have half a chance against the British, wrote the first ever drill manual for the U.S., yelled at us in German and French, oh and he had a spoiled ass doggo he loved named Azor. Picked up two more twinks, got this lil ol house, died there, the end. He was friends with, like, all the important people your teacher actually tells you about. He was only being paid half. So yeah, he slayed.

random soldier: OH MY GOD WHO TF WAS THAT BARON VON STEUBEN GUY I HATE HIS BOOK, WHY DO WE HAVE TO CARRY IT AROUND!?
Me: Bro I wish I had one, BUT THEY'RE 80 FUCKING DOLLARS!?

200 years ago:
Baron Von Steuben: hey y'all I'm your new sugar daddy drillmaster
Du Ponceau: I'm his emotional support French twink
Walker: I'm just here for the money.
North: Hi, I'm one of the boyfriends, and I have a minor drinking problem
Azor: ruff ruff
AAAAAAND THAT'S THE BARON'S HAREM OF GAY FRENCHIES IN A NUTSHELL!
Washington: I don't get paid enough for this.
LaFayette: I don't get paid anything for this!

by IofogslawurysKisskiss April 25, 2024


Flighty Von Dipshit

An inept or unaware person.

There goes Flighty Von Dipshit, lost in her own world.

by Emogenome August 15, 2019


Von Gold

A person who makes people “uh uh” at every show they dj. Von gold is a successful dj/producer despite the distraction of being a magnet for crazy betches, but loves it.

Von Gold has many talents from cooking culinary masterpieces to doing large audience laser light shows, but is mostly famous for pleasuring lucky woman. Von Gold is a legend, a mystery, and some believe Von Gold is a unicorn.

Von Gold only drinks quality tequila.
The finest music selection is artistically performed by the legendary Von Gold.

by MVG42069 November 23, 2021


Von Schlieffened

The act of getting attacked from behind often bamboozling the enemy, Referring to the German strategist (Alfred Von Schlieffen) who created the famous WWI Schlieffen Plan.

Oh no we just got Von Schlieffened

by Vombat May 3, 2020


Shconty (von Smell)

A selfish fat lazy shit formed over a billion years ago with megarexia and immense stupidity and multiple eating disorders and a gicantic invisible schlong bigger than the universe itself.

Also known as: yeshacontyconteiryrabbaigamliellevonsmellulercelulitus.

Shconty (Von Smell) your so kind.

by Ellosvs July 16, 2021


Matty von scatty

Worst fool

Matty von scatty

by Yittanigh December 17, 2018


vons penis

vons penis is very large and hard 24/7

"did ya know abt vons penis" "yeah i heard it was very, very large and hard"

by kazzysbf March 14, 2021